Read My Mind
by WhirledPeace
Summary: A TobixDei, yaoi story, based on the song Read My Mind by The Killers. Deidara is getting over his complicated relationship with Sasori after his old master's death, but what happens when more complications arise because of Tobi? Can they work it through?
1. Introduction

Ours was a strange love. Ours was a hateful love, a hurtful love, a haunted love. Ours was a trying love, a tortured love, a tainted love. It wasn't love, it was desperation. We both knew we were destined to die, we both knew we were going to die, and so we tried to live. We jumped on the nearest thing: each other. He jumped me, I jumped him, we tried to relieve some of our pressures on each other. It was never enough for either of us, always irritable, always craving more. Nothing seemed to satisfy us, nothing would ever make us happy.

We weren't a couple. Couples comfort each other, couples care for each other, and couples cry for each other. Comfort? That was out of the question. We would rather laugh at each other when one of us was hurt rather than help. If ever Sasori got hurt, I would be sure to kick him while he was down. But that rarely happened, I was hurt more often than he was, and he too took advantage of the situation and was sure to kick me. And care for each other? Give me a break. Like I would stumble back to headquarters and find him waiting for me, or making me a nice dinner, or preparing a nice bath, like they do in fantasy love tails. If I did, I'd probably assume I'd gone insane or something, or died and gone to hell, or he was planning something amazingly diabolical that was worth sacrificing his pride for. I never trusted him, not even for a second. And cry? If we were a couple, I would stand here and cry over his broken, mangled corpse. But I'm not, am I? I'm standing here, and I'm laughing. At first my laughter started out as a chuckle under my breath, then to a bark, and then to a hysterical, lung-bursting laugh. The poor, sorry bastard was killed by someone he could've easily defeated! I nearly had tears rolling down my cheeks, and was sobbing for breath by the time I finally calmed down enough to stop my uncontrollable laughter. I know Tobi and Zetsu were giving me strange looks, but does that matter to me? Of course not. I was insane. I was hysterical. I was out of control. And I was confused, very, very confused.


	2. You Say You Want To Move On

A/N: Thank you, my lovely reviewers! Sorry for changing the title, and if you've never heard the song 'Read My Mind' then you really should. I don't own these characters, or the song. After all, if I owned Naruto, crazy shit would happen. And since we're still in fillers, I guess it's basic proof I don't own it.

* * *

Deidara lay next to Sasori, trying to get his breathing under control. Sasori snorted and sat up, swinging his legs out of the bed. "You're so weak," he said emotionlessly. "you can't even handle sex," Deidara sat up, glaring at Sasori's back.

"You're lucky I'm the only one who can handle you, you fucking piece of wood," he shot back. Sasori stood up, grabbing his pants and slipping into them.

"I don't have time to exchange insults with you," he said.

"Oh, you have time to screw me, but not-"

"Be quiet, Deidara," Sasori snapped, turning to give the bomber a glare that could melt bricks. Deidara, despite his deepest desires, kept his mouth shut and watched his master finish dressing himself. "We need to leave within the hour, get ready," Sasori said quietly, walking over to his own bed and began getting his puppets in order. Deidara sighed and dragged himself out of the bed. If Sasori hadn't insisted on screwing him for half an hour, then he'd be able to talk properly. Of course he could endure pain, and it would wear off in about fifteen minutes, but when Sasori said they needed to leave it meant their lives were in danger, and they would likely be leaving by a window without paying. Deidara dressed himself, packed his clay, and mulled over what to do. He glanced at Sasori, who was still assembling various puppets and scrolls. Sighing, he flopped down on the bed again, staring at the white ceiling. His only clue that Sasori was gone was a slight cough, and then Sasori was out the door. Sighing, Deidara got up and leapt out the window. The plan was to split up, so that it would be twice as hard to find them. Deidara dropped to the ground on silent feet, much like a cat, and scanned the area with his mechanical eye. Nothing. Not letting himself to be fooled by some hidden trap, Deidara proceeded cautiously. He had no idea where his partner was, but that didn't exactly matter. They both knew the meeting place, and would find each other later.

As silently as he could, Deidara crept forward, out of the shadow the hotel cast. He had no clue who or what he was to watch out for, Sasori never thought it was needed information for his partner. Deidara scanned the horizon, trying to see what exactly was after him. Sighing, he decided to just go to the meeting place and blow up anyone who looked at him wrong. Just as he took another step forward, something landed on him and his world went black.

* * *

Deidara woke up with his hands tied behind his back, his ankles tied together, and a rag tied in his mouth. His first coherent thought was 'Oh shit, I'm screwed,'. He kept his eye closed, so as to keep the appearance of still being unconscious, and instead looked around with his mechanical eye. He could see, from his vantage on the ground, a campfire and five men sitting around it. On the far side, all piled up, were six packs. 'At least one more,' Deidara thought. It was dark, and they seemed to be camped in the woods. Glancing upwards, he noticed the moon was half full. That meant he had only been unconscious for the day, no more. Through the smoke of the fire, Deidara focused his eye on the forehead protectors. He had no trouble seeing who his captors were, it's why he got the mechanical eye in the first place. Konoha. That would mean they would be traveling south, so when he escaped he would have to travel East. Keeping his mechanical eye open and alert, and still pretending to be unconscious, he tried to figure out what had happened. They had come from above, so they had obviously been waiting on the roof. Damn. They had been right outside the window. How could he fall for such a stupid trick? It would never happen again. "Hey," one of the men said. "go kick the prisoner, see if he's up," a man who hadn't spoken stood up and sidled over to Deidara. What Deidara hadn't noticed before was now blatantly obvious: the men had been drinking. The man kicked him roughly in the ribs, then bent to his face.

"I think he's awake," he said, speech slightly slurred. 'Damn,' Deidara thought, still remaining absolutely still.

"Are we near a town?" asked one of the men still at the campfire.

"Nowhere near," replied the first man who had given the order to check the prisoner. "why?"

"I seriously need a girl," admitted the one who had asked. "and we're nowhere near Konoha,"

"This one sort of looks like a girl," said the man nearest Deidara, who had simply sat down next to him. Deidara said a silent prayer to any deity that would listen that he was not about to be raped. But, of course, no deity would listen to a killer.

"Let me first, then," the man who had been complaining said, standing and lumbering over to Deidara. Deidara shut his mechanical eye off and held his breath. . .

* * *

Sasori wasn't a patient puppet. If he wanted to go, Deidara always needed to be ready. If Deidara was in the shower, too bad. If Deidara was in the deepest sleep of his life, tough. And especially if Sasori wanted sex, Deidara mattered even less. But now the brat had kept his master waiting for three days. Three whole days Sasori had sat at the corner of what they called the Main Way. It was where the two most common routes to the Akatsuki hideout met, and Sasori was sick of looking at it. For once in his life, he wanted to see his partner. Or, at least, a piece of his partner so he could say Deidara was dead and be done with it.

It was midday on the fourth day when, through the trees, stumbled Deidara. His hair was matted and bloodied, wounds covering his body. Bits of his clothes still clutched at his sweaty skin, his cloak was in tatters, his shirt completely destroyed and any clothing that had previously covered him from the knees down was sliced off. And his one visible eye was wide in delayed shock, leaping and scratching at all Deidara could see. Sasori, now knowing his partner was alive, was immediately enraged at Deidara for keeping him waiting. "Where the hell have you been?!" he shrieked at Deidara. Deidara glared at him.

"All thanks to you I was captured. You're lucky I was able to escape without disclosing any information-"

"You could've been a bit quicker about it," Sasori huffed. "and how is it my fault your own skill couldn't save you?" Deidara just glared. "We should be moving on, Deidara, and getting back to the base. Leader will want to know how our mission went," Sasori turned to plunder off into the forest, leaving Deidara dumbstruck.

"Do you know what they did to me?!" he cried, lurching after Sasori.

"If they managed to do anything, then you must be falling behind in your training," Sasori said emotionlessly.

"They raped me, Danna!" Sasori didn't even break stride.

"Why should I care? Your skills failed to protect you,"

"Sasori!" Deidara screamed. Exasperatedly, the puppet master turned to face his partner.

"What is wrong with you?" their eyes met, and it all became clear to Deidara. He had known Sasori long enough to be able to practically read his mind. That one look said: 'I would do the same, if I needed to,'. Of course it had always been willing with Sasori, but Deidara had never entertained the thought of if he had said no the first time. What would Sasori do if Deidara said no?

Sasori turned and began walking again. Deidara sighed. He might've known Sasori enough to read his mind, but the puppet master knew nothing of Deidara's thoughts. Nothing at all.


	3. Tobi's Got a Little Fight

A/N: Thank you, everyone! I'm glad my first story as so many people who like it. And sorry about the whole Deidara Sympathy device, I will attempt to keep things a little more neutral. And I know nothing about Zetsu, so I apologize. I'm going to take a vote: do you want Tobi/Obito or Tobi/Madara?

* * *

If one thing could be said for Tobi, it would be that he was persistent. Not in the sense that if he wanted something, no one could stop him, but in the sense of getting to know people. You see, Tobi believed that you could learn to like anyone, as long as you had an open mind. All you had to do was talk to them, and know where they're coming from, you can understand them and respect them. That is how Tobi was able to stay with Zetsu, he was able to understand the plant man. After all, Zetsu was his own partner for a good reason.

Another thing that made Tobi likeable was the fact he didn't ask for much. As long as he could keep his mask on, he was always happy. He seemed almost childlike in his acceptance of others, and mature in his needs. At times, it seemed that only two things were needed for Tobi's happiness: his mask and others' happiness.

Perhaps all of these things attracted the plant man to Tobi. Zetsu rarely could stand the presence of anyone, let alone someone like Tobi. And yet, there they were, walking together. "Zetsu?" Tobi asked, piping up for the first time in hours.

"Yes, Tobi?" replied Zetsu's kinder side.

"Do you think I'll get into the Akatsuki?" he asked. Zetsu shrugged his plant-laden shoulders.

"It depends, Tobi. We don't necessarily hire upon openings, but I suppose Deidara does need a partner," Zetsu paused. "why are you asking?"

"Oh, I don't know," Tobi said whistfully. "if I do get in, does that mean I'll be taking Akasuna-no-Sasori's place?"

"**Why**?" Zetsu's black side asked suspiciously.

"I was just wondering," Tobi replied happily, evidently unperturbed by his sensei's suspicion. Zetsu gave a slight twitch that could've been taken for a nod and they continued on in silence.

It was an hour since their last little conversation, and finally they reached Akatsuki HQ. They stood at the entrance, and soon enough Pein was standing before them, cloaked in shadow. Zetsu bowed his head slightly. "Pein-sama," he said, voice soft. "Tobi wishes to join our ranks,." Pein looked Tobi over, sizing him up.

"Do you think he should join?" Pein asked. Zetsu shrugged.

"I think he has potential," Zetsu said vaguely. Pein rolled his eyes, questioning his choice of evil villains yet again.

"Anything more specific?" he asked.

"No, not really. He doesn't really give up, though, pretty persistent," Zetsu elaborated once he noticed the slight twitch in Pein-sama's eye.

"Right, then. Tobi, come with me," Pein turned and walked away from the hideout, into the surrounding forest. Zetsu knew he was not welcomed and seated himself on a rock.

"Tobi is a good boy," Zetsu's white side said.

"**You said he was persistent, but is that enough? We both know Tobi doesn't fight that well,**" Zetsu's black side pointed out.

"Tobi has a little fighting skill," Zetsu's white side said. "enough to be a ninja, so there shouldn't be a problem,"

"**Do you think Tobi wants to move up and become an Akatsuki enough to impress Pein-sama?**" Zetsu's black side asked bluntly.

"Do you think Tobi should move up and become an Akatsuki enough to impress Pein-sama?" Zetsu's white side shot back.

"**I don't know,**" his black side admitted. "**he seems completely useless, but then again. . ."**

"You still wonder about that?" Zetsu's white side asked.

"**As an Akatsuki member, we should remember every little detail. That night is not something we can overlook so easily**," his black side stated. "**it was out of character, and almost completely random. And Tobi doesn't remember it,**"

"And you insist on remembering it?" questioned his white side.

"**Absolutely,**" his black side stated without hesitation.

* * *

It was a calm summer night, the kind where the air hangs humidly and insects buzz lazily around. It was the kind of night you forget your worries and kick back with a cool drink and relax. At least, for normal people. Not Akatsuki. Zetsu was coming back to HQ from a mission and arguing quietly with himself about whether or not he had been subtle enough, and Tobi was keeping his distance from the plant man, not wanting to become a snack. They were only about a day's walk from HQ, but it was getting late so Zetsu, both sides of him, decided to stop for the night. They pitched camp in the forest, a very secluded little clearing that had many escape routes, in case of attack. Tobi knew his sensei was tired, so he offered to stand watch. This set off another bout of arguing of Zetsu with himself, but eventually Tobi was allowed to stand guard while Zetsu slept.

"**I don't think he could handle an attack,**" Zetsu's black side whispered to his white.

"Don't worry, we'll stay awake and listen," Zetsu's white side said. But of course, Zetsu was so very tired, and eventually his eyelids began to droop and within an hour he was asleep. So much for staying up.

It was almost 1:00 in the morning when Zetsu awoke with a start, not knowing what exactly had woken him. He quickly scanned the camp and shot to his feet, more alarmed than he had been for a long while. Tobi was standing, staring as blankly as Zetsu at two ANBU, dead ANBU, at his feet. "**Tobi, what happened?**" shrieked his black side, rushing over to Tobi. Tobi looked up at him blankly.

"I don't know," he said honestly. "I was keeping guard, just like I said I would, when I heard a noise. I turned to look, and then the next thing I know I'm standing here. . .with them. . ." he gestured at the corpses. Zetsu blinked, too confused to form a question.

"You remember nothing?" asked his white side. Tobi shook his head.

"Not even darkness. It's like I skipped time or something. . ." Tobi looked off into the forest, trailing away from his sentence. Zetsu remained silent for a full minute, letting Tobi try and remember. When he realized that Tobi was not going to remember, he took the situation into his own hands.

"Get cleaned off, I'll clean up here," he ordered. Tobi looked down at himself and jumped slightly when he realized he was covered in blood. He looked to Zetsu in confusion.

"How did that. . .?"

"There's a creek nearby. I'll expect you back in ten minutes," Zetsu said. Tobi nodded and scurried off. Once Zetsu was positive he was gone, he quickly devoured the bodies and then sat on a rock to mull things over.

"Tobi doesn't remember what happened," Zetsu's white side said.

"**Are you sure he wasn't lying?**" asked Zetsu's black side skeptically.

"No, he was as confused as we were," Zetsu's white side said. "and he has no reason to lie, he knows we don't care if he killed them,"

"**Then how do you suppose he doesn't remember? Did he hit his head while fighting? And why weren't we awaken by the fight?**" Zetsu's black side shot.

"Maybe they put a jutsu on us?" suggested his white side. "And hit Tobi's head?" Zetsu shook his head.

"**I'm not convinced,**" his black side said. "**it doesn't add up,**" And his white side, though did not verbally state it, agreed. It didn't add up.

* * *

That was the only incident where Tobi did something he didn't remember. Usually he had a very keen memory, he could say almost everything that had happened since he had met Zetsu. But anything before that was completely gone. It wasn't that it was fuzzy, or not as sharp, it just simply wasn't there. Zetsu had assumed it was a severe brain trauma, erasing everything except the basics. Tobi hadn't even known his own name. And thus Zetsu had accepted him, naming him, and teaching him what he had forgotten.

But there were some times when Tobi performed a miraculous feet of ninja excellence, and had no idea how he did it. He told Zetsu he could remember some moves that other people used just by looking at them, and had probably seen them before he met Zetsu, and only his body could remember. Zetsu had begrudgingly accepted this, for it was the only logical explanation for his random strokes of genius.

* * *

"Zetsu-sensei!" Tobi cried, running from the forest with Pein following slowly behind him. "I'm in the Akatsuki!" he showed his sensei his ring. "And I'm going to be Deidara-san's partner!" Zetsu turned to Pein and quirked an eyebrow.

"I believe he will be able to help turn the Akatsuki around," he said, his voice low.

"I see," Zetsu's white side said. Zetsu may not know his employer that well, but he could practically read Pein's intentions. It had something to do with what Tobi could not remember. Pein stalked off into the head quarters, unaware that Zetsu could read his mind.

* * *

A/N: I'm sorry! I know it sucked! And just for your convenience, here's the lyrics to 'Read My Mind': /read-my-mind-lyrics-the-killers.html

Please review and tell me which Tobi you like best!


	4. Old Days, Honesty, and Restlessness

A/N: I'm not telling you my official Tobi, because that would be mean. I'm going to use that blasted showing not telling writing, so you'll have to guess who he is! (ok, it was a tie at the time I posted this chapter, so I'm sorry, but not even I know.) One more thing: I beg you, review and tell me how I can work the Promised Land into this! It doesn't make sense!

* * *

Deidara didn't have to be a fan of change to hate what was happening to him. Deidara had needs and feelings, just like everyone else, just that they were ignored more than everyone else's. And what Deidara needed was some quiet time to sort out how he felt about Sasori's death. He did not need a pumpkin faced ball of energy pestering him and being a pain.

"No," he stated firmly. "I refuse," Deidara crossed his arms over his chest and looked pointedly at the wall. Pein sighed.

"Deidara, you cannot refuse your partner," he said. "Tobi is your new partner, and I expect him to be adequately trained,"

"None of us had to train anyone before!" Deidara cried, leaping to his feet. "Sasori didn't have to train me, Kisame didn't train Itachi-"

"Deidara!" snapped Pein. "I don't care what they had to do, this is what **you **have to do. Or would you rather I let you go?" Deidara snarled but reclaimed his seat, muttering to himself. Tobi managed to hear something like 'Not like before,' and 'things were better before,'.

"Pein-sama," Tobi said quietly. "maybe I shouldn't be Deidara's partner," Pein looked at him.

"Oh, he's all right," he replied. "he's just throwing a fit because he's a brat," Deidara flinched slightly at the name Sasori used to lash him with. "Now then. You two will be sharing a room, as all the other pairs have to do," he shot Deidara a look. "and will complete missions together. Any questions?"

"Why me?" Deidara mumbled.

"Because you are small, insignificant, and useless. You play no major role in this organization, and were only as good as Sasori decided to keep you around. Now that he's gone, either you obey my orders or you die. Got it?" Deidara said nothing. "Do you understand?"

"Hai, Pein-sama," Deidara said, not meeting his master's eyes.

"Good. Get going, then, I'm tired of looking at you. I expect Tobi's training to begin tomorrow,"

"Hai," Deidara said, standing and rushing out of the office.

"Follow him, Tobi," Pein said,

"Arigato, Pein-sama," Tobi said as he ran out the door after Deidara. "Sempai!" he called. Deidara didn't even bother to stop, just continued rushing down the hall. Tobi rushed after him. Deidara turned a corner, Tobi followed. Deidara ran through the maze of hallways too fast for Tobi to remember where he was, Tobi still followed. Finally, Deidara came to his room and in a flash Tobi was standing outside a slammed door. "Deidara-san?" he asked, knocking on the door. No answer. "Deidara-sempai?" Again, no answer. Inside the room, Deidara was leaning against the door. He knew he was being childish, locking Tobi out of their room, but at this moment he didn't really care. Anyone could call him a brat as much as they wanted, he would not put up with the orange abomination. "Deidara-sempai, Tobi has something to tell you," the pure honesty in Tobi's voice made Deidara stop and press his ear to the door. "Tobi doesn't want to make you unhappy," Deidara snorted. "but Tobi doesn't know how not to. If you could just tell him what he did wrong, then maybe Deidara-sempai wouldn't have to be so frustrated at Tobi,"

"Sleep in the hall tonight, un, for all I care," Deidara said, tired of listening.

"If it helps," Tobi said. Deidara glared at the door and made his way over to his bed. He was sick and tired of everything, and just wanted to sleep until he died.

* * *

It is not pleasant to have to wake up. It is not pleasant to have to wake up when one is feeling depressed. And it is not pleasant to wake up, when one is depressed, to the punching bag of all one's emotional confusion, too early to even see the sun. This, unfortunately, happened to Deidara. And even more unfortunately, his punching bag was nowhere in sight.

_Deidara sat on the ground, staring at Sasori's dead body. He felt an overwhelming sense of calm tranquility. There was no sense of time, no fear of what was to come, just the moment. Deidara knew exactly what he had to do. He had to figure out what he was feeling, while he had this moment of peace. In a slow, deliberate way he gazed upon the face of his old master, Sasori. "Did you hate me?" he asked the immobile pile of human-shaped wood. "Did you truly just want me for the sex?" Deidara got no reply from the corpse, but it opened up so many more things he could ask himself. "Did I really hate you? Was it just the sex?" he asked out loud to himself. He thought for a long time, just staring at the puppet master. "You couldn't bleed, you couldn't understand anything human," he said slowly. "and what am I if not human?" Deidara sat for another long moment. "But then again, you thought you were eternal. You are eternal. So if you're eternal, why did you die?" Deidara looked around him at the wreckage of puppets. "So you got yourself killed on purpose?" he asked. "got tired of being eternal?" he stood up, his mind growing restless. He needed answers, and he needed them now! "Your art wasn't enough, you didn't want what you had! You think I'm a brat, for wanting human things, but I think you're the brat here," Deidara knew he sounded stupid, acting as if brat meant something. "Look at what you had! You had a criminal record that stretched farther than anyone else's! You had eternal life, you had a loving grandmother! You had a family, an upbringing! What on earth could possibly drive you to suicide?" Deidara practically threw himself at Sasori's feet. He stopped, realizing he was the nearest to tears he had been for a long while. He looked at the puppet master. "You had me," he said, his voice barely above a whisper. Suddenly he felt a hand on his shoulder. Nearly screaming, Deidara leapt around and came face-to-mask with Tobi. _

"_I know," he said. Deidara blinked. _

"_Know what?" he demanded. _

"_I know," Tobi repeated. He put his hand on Deidara's shoulder again, and. . ._

Deidara awoke with a start, finding his sheets sticking to his clammy, sweaty skin. He looked around in bewilderment for a moment before remembering where he was. With an exasperated sigh he flopped back onto his bed. He knew that would be his only time to figure out what was going on in his heart, and Tobi had ruined it. Of course, not the real Tobi, but if he hadn't been bothering Deidara the other day then he would've never appeared in the artist's dreams. Deidara glared at the dark ceiling. He wouldn't get any more sleep, after a dream like that. Restlessly, he sat up and swung his legs out of bed. Quietly, he padded over to the door and opened it slowly. On the floor, like a faithful dog, was Tobi. "Tobi," Deidara whispered. Tobi didn't stir. Deidara slipped out of the room and seated himself by the sleeping figure. Maybe he would get another chance to think about his restless emotions.

* * *

A/N: again, review and give me A. your opinion on the whole 'Who is Tobi?' thing. B. How in the name of all that is scented like fudge can I work in the Promised Land? (you will be given credit if I use your idea!)


	5. A Subtle Kiss

A/N: Thank you my reviewers! I'm sorry that I didn't tell you, because at the time I didn't know! (it was a tie! Oh noes!) If you REALLY wanted to know, you'd just read the reviews and see what the majority of votes say! And I'm sorry about the Dei sympathizing, I shall steer clear of any of that! If I can share a life experience, I just saw a squirrel commit suicide off my fence.

* * *

Tobi awoke to a grey, drizzling morning. Not that he could tell of course, the halls didn't have windows. But unlike the fairytales, tobi felt the exact opposite of the weather. He sat up, cracked his back, and looked around. He was alone in the cold, unpainted hall exactly where he had fallen asleep: outside Deidara's door. He stood up and tried to think of what to do. He stepped up to Deidara's door and knocked lightly. "Deidara-san?" he asked. No reply. "Deidara-san, I'm sorry about yesterday. But I meant what I said, I think if you just told me what not to do, then we'd be able to get along," Still no reply. "I understand you're angry about all this, and it's so close to Akasuna-no-Sasori's death and all, and I'm not making any of this any easier," Still nothing. Tobi sighed. It made sense that Deidara was still mad at him. "Deidara-san, I'm sorry," he said in defeat.

"This is rather pathetic," came a voice from behind him. Tobi turned to see. . .now what was his name?

"Hello Kisame-san," Tobi said.

"Tobi, Deidara-san left early this morning, he's not in his room," Kisame said, grinning from ear to ear. . .if he had them.

"Oh," Tobi said, glad his mask covered his blush.

"What were you talking about, anyway?" the shark man asked, leaning against the wall.

"Um. . .nothing?" Tobi tried. Kisame shook his head.

"Did Deidara lock you out of your own room?" he asked.

"Yeah," Tobi admitted. Kisame chuckled.

"And he's mad at you?"

"Yeah,"

"And you're trying to apologize?"

"Yeah,"

"Even if Deidara-san was in there, you'd still be wasting your time," Kisame said. He seemed to be bored with the conversation and continued on his way down the hall.

"You told him?" Tobi heard someone whisper.

"Yeah, it was too pathetic," Kisame replied.

"I just wish Deidara had seen, he would've been laughing so hard," the person whispered. Tobi's cheeks burned in shame. He placed his hand on the handle, turned, and pushed the door open silently. The room was basically blank, with an occasional lump of clay lying around. There was a bed at the far end with a simple wire frame and grey blankets. To his right Tobi saw a second bed, this one with only a mattress on the cold wire frame. Gulping, Tobi surveyed the rest of the room. There was a door that presumably led to a closet, and a single window, set high in the ceiling with bars across it. Tobi stepped further into the room and sat down on what he presumed to be his bed, the one without a pillow or blankets. The mattress did not deserve to be called a mattress. It was likely stuffed with rocks than any sort of stuffing, and in places large wholes gaped up like dead, empty eye sockets. Slightly disturbed by this image, Tobi got up and went over to investigate the closet. When he opened it he found an Akatsuki coat, a fishnet shirt, a pair of blue pants, and a fire patterned kimono. There was something at the back of the little closet, and as Tobi scuffled to see what it was he found it to be a puppet. It was only half finished, but looked sort of like a male puppet. Curiously, Tobi sat down to study it more carefully. It was only about a foot long, with arms, legs, and a head. The hands hadn't been carved, and were still just lumps, and the head was just an egg on the neck. Tobi carefully lifted one of the arms, the joints working silently and without resistance.

"What are you doing, un?" a voice asked tiredly from the doorway. Tobi leapt to his feet and hid the puppet behind his back, turning to see his sempai standing in the doorway, dirt crusting on his shoes, the hem of his coat, and his hands. In fact, there was dirt on the coat itself, smearing his cheeks, and in his hair.

"Good morning, Deidara-sempai," he said cheerily, hoping to lift Deidara's mood. "I was just looking around,"

"Seems I missed a puppet," Deidara muttered, walking over to Tobi and snatching the puppet from him. "where did you find it?"

"In the closet," Tobi replied. Deidara looked up at him.

"What were you doing in my closet?" he asked.

"I was just looking around," Tobi said casually. Deidara looked at him suspiciously.

"Right. Follow me," he turned sharply and walked out of the room, Tobi following like a loyal little puppy. Deidara twisted and turned through the maze of halls before finally they were out in the open. Deidara walked a little ways into the forest before stopping in a large, burnt clearing. It looked like a bomb had gone off and, knowing Deidara, this was likely the case. "This is Sasori-no-Danna's puppet," Deidara said as he molded a small clay spider. "Sasori believed his art was eternal. But that's just boring, isn't it? Art is only art because it is fleeting," Deidara placed the puppet in the middle of his man-made clearing and stepped back. "My art is fleeting, and true art. And you want to know why? My art can make his art just as fleeting as mine," Deidara stepped back some more, made a few hand signs, and the puppet exploded. Tobi blocked his face with one arm as debris flew around him. Once the smoke had cleared, Tobi noticed Deidara had strategically hidden himself behind a tree. "See Tobi? That's art," Deidara stepped out from behind the tree, grinning maniacally. "Consider this your training," Deidara said, looking at Tobi seriously now. "because it's about the best you're going to get,"

* * *

It had been hours, and Tobi was about ready to drop dead. Deidara insisted that if Tobi couldn't handle what the most useless member of Akatsuki could dish out, then he didn't deserve to be in Akatsuki. It was past noon now, and they still hadn't taken a break. Of course, the training was easier on Deidara than Tobi. All Deidara was doing was standing beside Tobi and either ordering him to do some insane work out or hitting him with a stick. "Fifty push-ups, un," or "Run up that tree and do a double back flip backwards without chakra, un," and, one of Deidara's favorites, "Go see if you can scare that cute little woodland animal to death, un,". Tobi could tell Deidara was just making things up on the spot by the satisfied smirk on his mouth.

Finally, after Tobi was forced to build a box out of twigs with his feet, he begged for a break. "Please, Sempai, just a little break? I need food, or maybe just some water. We can go right back to training right after I promise!" Deidara rolled his eyes.

"Didn't you hear Leader yesterday? I'm the most insignificant member. So why would you need a break from my lenient training, hmm?" Deidara sighed. "Fine. But we go right back," he stood up from the rock he was sitting on, taking the stick with him as he trudged back to HQ. Tobi stayed put.

"Deidara-sempai! You forgot to untie me!" he called.

"Do it yourself, un!" Deidara called over his shoulder. Tobi sighed.

* * *

Tobi walked into HQ, rubbing his wrists. Deidara had said that Tobi would cheat if he didn't have his hands tied behind his back, and Tobi found out first hang that Deidara was good at tying knots. But in the end Tobi had escaped and was now wandering through the halls, hopelessly lost. Suddenly, he heard raised voices coming from a room. Hopefully, he walked up to the door and opened it a crack.

"What the hell?! No!" Deidara was screaming. Pein sighed loudly.

"Deidara, must I constantly remind you that you have no choice in the matter? I was promised a certain amount of land, and all I ask you to do is go secure the deal," Pein said.

"Why not send Kakuzu, un?" asked Deidara, to angry to sit.

"Kakuzu and Hidan are out on a mission, Itachi and Kisame are due to go out on a mission tomorrow. Zetsu is doing a spy mission I sent him on yesterday, and Konan is unable to complete missions right now. So who does that leave?" Deidara growled and sat in his chair. "That leaves you and Tobi, Deidara," Pein said patronizingly.

"I know that, un!" Deidara snapped.

"Just making sure. You'll be sent out tomorrow, and have a week and a half to complete the mission. Understand?"

"Hai, Pein-sama," Deidara mumbled.

"Good. Now get out of my sight," Deidara stood up and burst out of the room, nearly colliding with Tobi.

"What are you doing here, un?" he snapped.

"I was just looking for you," Tobi said.

"We have a mission," Deidara said. "we have to go to Leaf territory to get some land for Leader," he then turned and stomped down the hall.

"Sempai! What about training?" Tobi called, running after him.

"Train your own damn self!" Deidara shot, not breaking stride. Tobi sighed and gave up on chasing him. At least he had a mission to look forward to.

* * *

_"I know," Tobi said. Deidara didn't even bother asking what Tobi knew. He was too startled by the Tobi he saw to really react much. Tobi was Tobi, of course. But his mask was gone. Deidara couldn't exactly see his face, it was slightly blurred, but he could see a white patch over Tobi's left eye._

_"Tobi, where's your mask, un?" Deidara asked. Tobi shook his head, as if Deidara's naivety was amusing. Suddenly, he reached out and pulled Deidara into an embrace. "what the hell, Tobi?!" Deidara cried, going rigid in Tobi's arms._

_"Shh," Tobi breathed. "I'm just here to help," his voice was somewhat deeper, and more mature than the Tobi Deidara knew. Carefully, Tobi leaned down and placed a small kiss on Deidara's cheek._

Deidara shot awake, breathing hard. He looked around, and then remembered he had locked Tobi out again. Tentatively, he put a finger to his cheek. No one had seen.


	6. A Broken Wrist

A/N: Ok, I have made up my mind. Tobi is. . . Weird Al! Ok, that's a lie. You all find out who Tobi is! Special thanks to Chibi-roy-chan, 1. For reading Vindicated, my other fic, and 2. For praising me to the stars! Thank you so much to all my reviewers, you all keep me going. And I'm sorry, I don't like who Tobi actually is, so I'm making up some shit!

* * *

It wasn't exactly a pretty day. There was a slight smattering of clouds, the sun shining half-heartedly through them. The ground was covered with dead leaves, crackling underfoot. A slight breeze was blowing from the south, giving the travelers a breath of fresh air. Not that they cared much, they were each completely and utterly absorbed in their own problems.

'Why has Sempai been ignoring me all day?' Tobi wondered. 'I'd expect him to yell at me at least once,' To test his theory, Tobi cleared his throat. "Um, Deidara-sempai?"

"Hmm?" Deidara turned his head, glancing backwards. He blinked, then turned forward again pointedly.

"Sempai?" no answer. Tobi sighed. "If you just told me what I did wrong-"

"Stop saying that," he cut in.

"Please, Sempai, I don't want to spend my whole time with you while you're angry with me! It'll make us both feel better," Deidara seemed to listen to his last sentence, mulling it over.

"It would make you happy if I wasn't mad at you?" he asked suspiciously. Tobi sighed.

"I would like it very much if we could just talk like normal people," Tobi said, almost to himself. Deidara heard, but said nothing for the rest of the day.

* * *

Once the sun began to set, Deidara led Tobi off the path and to a clearing. "We'll set up camp here," he said, dropping his pack on the ground. "Start the fire, Tobi," Deidara then unzipped his pack and removed a blanket. It was as much as he could take for a bed, Leader wouldn't let them take too much for such a small mission. Deidara looked behind him, noticing in surprise Tobi hadn't made a single move to start a fire. Tobi, the lazy ass, was leaning against a tree, arms crossed across his chest. "Tobi, I said-"

"Deidara-chan," Tobi said. His deeper, matured voice was enough to keep Deidara from finishing his sentence, let alone what Tobi had called him. "Deidara-chan, we need to talk," Tobi stood up now, and walked slowly, languidly over to where Deidara was frozen in shock. "You aren't being very nice to me," Deidara recovered from his shock and stood up.

"Who are you?" he demanded. "You're not Tobi," Tobi, who was not really Tobi, chuckled darkly.

"You catch on fast. Though it would be plausible that Tobi-kun would call you that, he calls you Deidara-chan in his head all the time," Deidara glared.

"So who are you, hmm?"

"I am Uchiha Madara," he said. Deidara gasped in shock.

"Take of your mask, un," he said in disbelief. Slowly, Madara removed his mask. Deidara gazed up into Madara's one good eye, the eye he despised.

"That damned. . .eye. . ." Deidara breathed, taking a step backwards. Madara chuckled and took a step forward.

"Yes, the same as Itachi's," Madara said.

"Who are you, Tobi or Madara?" asked Deidara, taking another step backwards.

"I am Madara," Madara said, stepping forward. "but I share this body with Tobi," Deidara took a step back.

"So what the hell do you want? Can't you go back in your little hiding place, hmm?" Madara stepped forward. Deidara stepped back. Forward. Back. Forward. Back.

"I'm a bit irritated," Madara said, very close to gritting his teeth.

"With what, un?" Deidara asked.

"You," Madara said, stepping forward. "You and the way you treat Tobi,"

"What about it, yeah?" Deidara snapped, stepping back.

"Let me put it nicely, before I loose my temper. You treat Tobi like shit, and he worships the ground you walk on. So either you get whatever crawled up your ass and died out of there, or I know exactly where you're crawling and dying," Madara stepped forward.

"It's Tobi's fault, un, for being so damn annoying," Deidara muttered, half-convinced this was some strange dream.

"It's not Tobi's fault, Deidara," Madara said menacingly. "and I don't enjoy being treated like you treat us. So stop it,"

"How do you expect me to act, hmm?" Deidara cried, stepping backwards. "Can't I just have a minute to figure things out?"

"What do you need to figure out, hmm?" asked Madara, mocking Deidara as he stepped forward. "Just give Tobi a chance," There was a minute of silence, where not even a wind dared disturb the stillness.

"Are you always watching?" Deidara asked softly.

"Yes. Though Tobi never stays conscious when I decide to show myself, I always am able to see and feel what is going on," Deidara took a step backward.

"Why are you. . .er, sharing a body, hmm?" he asked.

"Because mine has long since died. Tobi was an amnesia victim whom no one recognized, so I decided he could live sharing with me. No one misses him, whoever he was, and no one noticed when he went missing. Whatever life he had, I'm glad he can't remember," Madara stepped forward.

"So how is his name Tobi, un, if he can't remember?" asked Deidara, stepping backward.

"I gave it to him," Madara replied, stepping forward.

"Where did you find him?"

"In the wilderness, half-starved and no clue who he was or where he was," replied Madara.

"Why do you want me to treat Tobi better, un?"

"Because I don't like being treated that way. Whenever you talk to Tobi, you talk to me," Madara said. "and I have to admit, I'm the only one who cares about Tobi. He doesn't have a past, so I might as well give him a half-decent future,"

"Pretty noble for a villain," Deidara said.

"Villain? Who said that?" Madara quirked an eyebrow.

"I assumed if you were good you wouldn't make Tobi join an evil organization, hmm," Deidara pointed out. This little train of conversation would've continued, and probably ended in violence, but was luckily or unluckily stopped by the sound of someone approaching. Madara acted instantly, tackling Deidara to the ground. Of course, Madara is not a gentle person, and in the process of tackling Deidara he failed to realize that Deidara's left hand was caught behind his back. The way they landed, all Madara had for a clue as to what had happened was the sickening crack and the slight shudder that ran through Deidara. Deidara, on the other hand, knew instantly something dreadful had happened to his hand. But he also knew he had to remain quiet, so he did his best by biting on his tongue to keep quiet. The sounds of someone approaching stopped, and Madara slowly got off Deidara.

"Stay here," he breathed as he slunk off through the trees. Deidara didn't dare move. If it was ANBU, he was dead. If it was the Kazekage's guards, he was dead. If it was any ninja, in fact, he was dead. Even those with small bounties over their heads would want to turn Deidara in for the large sum over his. It seemed with every month that Deidara was not found, the bounty grew.

Deidara only dared to move his left arm out from under him and place it on his chest. Otherwise, he was completely still, senses alerted to every sound in the forest. Did birds always sound so menacing? How long had owls sounded so human? It seemed Deidara lay in pain and wait for eternities, but it was only a half an hour. After about thirty minutes, Madara stalked through the trees to hoist Deidara onto his back and climb the nearest tree. "It was ANBU. They're dead, but they might've sent out a call for help. We need to get away from here, now," Madara explained, adjusting Deidara so that he was slung like a sack of potatoes. Then, without warning, Madara leapt to the next tree, swinging on a branch as if the whole forest were a giant trapeze. Deidara would've screamed, if not for his mortal terror of being captured. In the midst of the panic, finding himself slung across an immensely dangerous clan leader who also happened to be his partner Tobi and being chased by supposed ANBU, Deidara wondered vaguely why he was afraid of being captured. But this was merely a fleeting flash of lightning in the roiling, boiling clouds of utter panic fogging Deidara's mind.

* * *

It was only after two hours of jumping from tree to tree that Madara declared they were safe, and that the ANBU hadn't actually called for help. Deidara was too tired to comment on the pure idiocy of running from nothing and simply fell upon the ground, thankful for life. After a few minutes he realized he left his pack and blanket back where they had originally planned to make camp. He glanced up at Madara, and saw the man placing two packs on the ground. Deidara blinked and sighed slightly. He turned over, and found his shoulder was wet. Curious, Deidara looked at his left shoulder and found his coat ripped open, exposing a nasty looking but. Utterly confused, Deidara tried to think of when he could've gotten such a wound. It must've been during his panic, and his coat must've caught on a branch or something. "What an interesting plant," Madara remarked, gesturing at a plant. Madara then seated himself against a tree. He sat there, his eye open and unmoving, as he watched a bird flutter by. Deidara groaned and sat up. What was he going to do about his shoulder? He was too tired to use his chakra, and was practically drained of adrenaline. Hopelessly, Deidara let his eyes wander to Madara, who still sat unmoving. Then his eyes fell beside Madara, to the plant Madara had commented on. Stupid plant, it wasn't even all that special, Deidara thought angrily. Suddenly, it clicked. That plant was athelas, a healing herb! Quickly, he crawled over to the plant and grabbed a few leaves, crushing them between his fingers and dabbed it in his cut. Oh, _Jesus,_ that stung. Deidara grabbed his pack and rummaged through it, finding a few bandages, grabbing more of the leaves and crushing their juices on the bandages before wrapping them around his shoulder, all with his right hand. Once it was tied suitably, he lay down, careful not to crush the athelas, and was promptly asleep. Madara glanced down at the sleeping Deidara, and there was a barely perceptible smirk.


	7. I Don't Mind if You Don't Mind

A/N: Thank you to my reviewers! You guys are the best! You all deserve gold stars! Ahem. Up next: the second hardest lines of the whole song! And I know nothing of fireflies, it's all made up!

* * *

Some mornings, after something unbelievable has happened, you wake up and think to yourself, 'Was that a dream?'. You then look around, looking for clues as to what exactly happened yesterday. Deidara did not have one of those mornings. He awoke with a dull, throbbing pain in his shoulder, a piercing pain in his wrist, and a foul taste in his mouth. He groggily opened his eyes and looked around, finding Madara asleep next to him. Or was it Tobi? Seeing as the person next to him was wearing a mask, Deidara guessed it was Tobi. Sighing, he sat up and leaned against the tree Madara had been sitting against last night, ready to think. It hurt greatly that he had come to the conclusion he had actually been in love with Sasori, but it was the truth. For some reason, he had fallen for the puppet master. Why else had he allowed those things they did to happen? Deidara sighed. So he had begrudgingly accepted he had loved his previous partner. Did that mean he couldn't love anyone else? Did that mean he would be being unfaithful to go with another? Of course not, Deidara reasoned half-heartedly. Even if he hadn't loved Sasori, the fact still remained that Sasori was dead, and hadn't ever given a shit about Deidara. So no one had loved Deidara except. . .now this was where things got confusing. Did Tobi love Deidara, and if so, did Madara love Tobi? If Madara didn't love Tobi, but still cared for him, then how did Tobi feel about Madara? Did Tobi know about Madara? Deidara's head began to swim, and he decided it was too early in the morning to think about the confusing Tobi/Madara concept. So was the whole Sasori concept. Deidara sighed, this was all too complicated to figure out. Glancing down at Tobi, he wondered if there was a creek or river nearby. Sighing, Deidara knew there probably was none for miles around. And what about his wrist? There were too many things to do to be sitting around, thinking about silly matters such as love. Deidara looked around, and spied a piece of bark that had peeled off a tree. Perfect.

* * *

Tobi had a strange dream. He had been running across hills of cool grass in the middle of the night, when he had come to a particularly scenic hill. On it, he saw Deidara lying peacefully with his hands behind his head. When Deidara saw Tobi, he simply offered Tobi to sit next to him and look at the stars. They lay there, dreaming the night away, together.

Tobi not only had a strange dream, but awoke to a strange scene. Deidara, whose left shoulder was bandaged and wrist put in a makeshift splint, was fiddling with his mechanical eye in frustration. "Stupid, useless piece of shit, un!" Deidara swore under his breath as his eye emitted a beep. Tobi, now interested, sat up to watch Deidara's struggle.

"Sempai?" he asked. Deidara looked over at him, only slightly irritated.

"Yes, Tobi?" he asked.

"Do you need help?" he asked.

"No," Deidara said. "my eye just took a picture, and now I can't erase it, hmm,"

"Oh. I didn't know it took pictures,"

"Yah, in case I need to remember something, un. It can also magnify, see longer distances, doesn't have to blink, and can see sources of heat, un," Deidara explained.

"Sounds better than a real eye," Tobi said. Deidara snorted.

"I got it cheap when someone decided to stab out my eye, un. What I wasn't told was that it has a mind of its own, hmm. It was made pretty badly, and there's only one like it. It almost has a mind of its own, and takes pictures whenever it feels like it, un," They sat in silence for a moment.

"Sempai?" Tobi asked, deciding to use Deidara's rare mood and ask a very important question. "I can't remember last night,"

"You're quite a heavy sleeper," Deidara replied. "by the time we stopped, you fell right asleep. Don't you remember?"

"No,"

"Oh. It must've been all that training I was putting you through that made you so tired,"

"What happened to your wrist?"

"I think I might've broke it when I punched a tree," Deidara replied.

"You punched a tree?"

"Well, yeah. I was frustrated that you decided to fall asleep on me and not make the fire,"

"And what about your shoulder?"

"Um. . .an owl landed on me," Deidara said, faltering slightly.

"Why did an owl land on you?" asked Tobi, thoroughly confused at Deidara's story. Why hadn't he heard all of this?

"I did punch the tree it was sleeping in," Deidara said, as if it were the most logical answer in the world.

"Oh," Tobi said. "why didn't I hear any of this?"

"It was a very silent owl. And like I said, you're a heavy sleeper. I was poking you with a stick for a while, and you wouldn't budge," Now that Tobi thought about it, he did feel like he had been poked by a stick half the night. They fell silent for another minute or so, before Deidara stood up. "We'd better get going,"

"I don't mind if you don't," Tobi said, getting up. Deidara didn't smile, but he did look at Tobi with something that wasn't anger or irritation.

* * *

Tobi was slightly confused about how they had gotten so far into the forest, but Deidara insister that that was where they had set up camp, and Tobi didn't have much choice in the matter. They began walking along the road, not talking. Deidara was evidently lost in his own thoughts, but as long as he wasn't glaring and yelling at Tobi, Tobi was fine with the lack of conversation. But not having anyone to talk to left Tobi to only wander among his own thoughts, which only led to questions. Deidara's story wasn't exactly what Tobi would call plausible, but neither was Tobi's loss of memory. And after all, it could've happened. Tobi didn't remember anything from before he met Zetsu, and he had that gap from the night in the forest, and the dead ANBU. And after all, he had gone through some serious training with Deidara, and maybe it was just catching up with him.

But it wasn't just that he was too tired to really remember, or that he had just fallen asleep. It was as if it hadn't happened, like it had just been edited out. It had only happened twice before, on the night he killed the ANBU and anything before his meeting with Zetsu. It wasn't that he simply couldn't remember, but if no one had told him then he would've been convinced it had never happened. This void, this cold unknown, was enough to send shivers down Tobi's spine.

Feeling that he was a bit too caught up in his own thoughts, Tobi glanced at Deidara. Then a scary thought hit him. What if Deidara was lying to him? Tobi would have no way of knowing. What if something bad happened? What if Tobi said something he shouldn't have? Tobi gulped, trying to keep his calm. Deidara, though extremely spacey and not altogether very sane, didn't look like he was lying. Tobi cleared his throat. "Sempai?" he asked. Deidara looked at him, deep blue eye gazing at Tobi entrancingly. Tobi sighed. "It looks like it's going to rain," he said half-heartedly. Deidara glanced up.

"Shouldn't be more than a little shower, we'll be fine, hmm," Deidara said. Tobi noted a lilt of strain in his voice, as if talking civilly to Tobi was a strain. This meant one of two things: 1. Deidara was lying. 2. The effort of remaining calm and being nice to Tobi was getting to him. Knowing Deidara, it could've been both.

"How long do you think we've been walking?" Tobi asked. Deidara glanced at the sun.

"No more than an hour, I should think, un," he replied.

* * *

It had been five hours of walking in the rain. Deidara didn't seem to mind the rain, he occasionally turned his eyes to the sky and smiled, but Tobi minded. He hated the way rain made your clothes hang down and stick to your skin, how every inch of you seemed completely soaked, and how, most of the time, rain was cold. But not today, it was a simple summer shower, and the rain was a pleasant lukewarm temperature.

Tobi watched his Sempai. Scratch what he had said before, Deidara loved the rain! It was the first time Tobi had seen him smile with a feeling that wasn't sadistic pleasure. Deidara turned his face to the sky, letting his soaked hair fall back, and smiled as he looked at the clouds. Tobi liked seeing his Sempai smile like that, but only wished that it could've been him that made Deidara smile so. A flash of lightning split the air, and Tobi jumped. "I thought you said it was only a shower," he said, slightly accusingly to Deidara. Deidara shrugged.

"It's pretty far off, no worries," he said. They walked on in silence for another half an hour, before Tobi broke the silence.

"Your shoulder looks like it's healing," he said. "it looked pretty deep," Deidara glanced over at his shoulder.

"You're right, hmm. I guess the athelas helped, yeah," Deidara said.

"Athelas?" asked Tobi.

"Yeah, there was some where we camped," Deidara explained.

"Sempai, athelas only grows in dense forestation," Tobi said.

"We were in dense forest," Deidara answered.

"We camped near the road," Tobi replied.

"The forest was dense there," Deidara argued.

"I remember we camped near the road,"

"Don't you remember trekking to the road this morning, un?"

"Then that means there's something you're not telling me," Tobi stated. Deidara's jaw dropped, but he closed it quickly and looked away.

"Why would I lie to you about something this stupid? We camped further in the forest than you remember because you were tired, and I found athelas. It's as simple as that," Tobi sighed, knowing he shouldn't argue with his Sempai. But now he knew Deidara was lying.

* * *

By nightfall the rain had stopped, and the forest had ended. They were now walking through grassy hills, rolling on to the horizon. Fireflies had come out now, winking and blinking all around them. Deidara had calmed down somewhat, and was now intrigued by the fireflies. "Here, Tobi, want to see something?" he asked. Tobi nodded eagerly. Deidara quickly snatched a firefly out of the air and held it cupped in his hands. "See this? It's a male. It flashes to get the female's attention, who's on the ground," Deidara handed the bug to Tobi and got on the ground. He searched for a moment, then straightened in triumph, holding a slightly larger bug that was not flashing its light. "Now this is a female, and she only shines her light if she sees another one. Right now she doesn't see any other lights, so she won't flash," Deidara looked at Tobi.

"That's sweet how the male keeps on trying to get her attention," Tobi said, noting that the male firefly was still flashing his light.

"I guess females of this species are just hard to please, un," Deidara reasoned. He tipped his hand, sending the female sliding onto Tobi's. "Now she'll light up. Go ahead, put them down," Tobi knelt and did as his Sempai bid, scooting the bugs off his hand and safely to the grass by the road. He then stood up again and smiled at Deidara. Then he remembered Deidara couldn't see his face, and sighed.

Tobi had his reasons for wearing his mask. He knew what he looked like, and didn't exactly like it. One of his eyes was gone, and if that wasn't repulsive enough, he had learned one of his eyes had Sharingan. Because of Itahci, Deidara hated those with Sharingan. Tobi didn't want his Sempai to hate him, so he had covered up his face to prevent Deidara from hating him. Tobi had thought that it wasn't working, Deidara still hated him, but now that his Sempai was being a little more kinder, Tobi thought that maybe things were beginning to work out.

Tobi constantly thought about how much he loved Deidara. And now, as he watched the retreating figure out his Sempai, he wondered if Deidara could read his mind.


	8. With Magic Soaking My Spine

A/N: Well then, I will hopefully get a lemon in the next chapter. If I don't, then don't kill me, I just enjoy the plot! A special thanks to fan girl 666 for being the only one to review ALL my chapters! You get a gold star!

* * *

Deidara was unconvinced. It was hard enough to admit he had loved Sasori, the very idea was eating him up. But now that Tobi was entering the picture, wasn't it all just happening too fast? Deidara had never loved anyone, and now he was being overridden by so many emotions it was threatening to consume him. If only he didn't have to figure it out himself, if only he had a sign of what was going on. But of course, you didn't get signs in the real world. That sort of thing only happened in fairy tales.

* * *

Tobi had convinced Deidara that, on the grounds that it was totally unethical and masochistic to continue on their journey without indulging in some minor luxuries, to rent a hotel room. They had been walking for the entire day, and part of Tobi thought Deidara didn't even know it. So he had convinced his Sempai to get a room, not only so that Tobi could rest, but so could Deidara. And, surprisingly. Deidara had agreed, though in a half-dazed state, and they had headed for the nearest town, discarding their Akatsuki cloaks and posing as conventional travelers.

But now, as Tobi looked around the hotel room, he wondered if it was really better than outside. The walls were peeling and crumbling, the ceiling was sagging, and the floorboards looked like they had seen better days. Deidara sighed. "Sometimes I forget how good it is to be indoors again," he said, walking over to the likely bug infested bed and sat down, plopping his bag next to him.

"You can have the bed," Tobi said, looking around for where the wood seemed soft enough to make sleeping comfortable. Unfortunately, this was everywhere. Sighing, he settled on a corner towards the back of the room, on the opposite side from the bed. Deidara was lying on the bed, staring at the yellowing ceiling. Tobi sighed.

Tobi has feelings too. Deidara's seemingly arbitrary switches from being nice and ignoring him weren't exactly what Tobi would call inviting, nor were they helpful. Tobi wasn't sure how Deidara wanted him to react, or act for that matter, and felt trapped. He wanted desperately to just tell Deidara everything that was going through his mind, all the things he felt in his heart. But how would Deidara react?

* * *

Deidara had been silent for the past hour, just lying on his bed and staring at the ceiling. Tobi sighed and stood silently, walking over to the bed. "Sempai," he said. Deidara glanced up.

"Yes, Tobi, un?" he replied tiredly.

"Sempai, can I talk to you?" Deidara sat up.

"About what?" he asked.

"Well, you see. . ." Tobi sighed. "Sempai, Tobi really likes you," he blurted. Deidara's eye widened, and they sat in silence for a half a minute. Sighing then, Deidara shook his head.

"I know, Tobi, hmm," he said.

"What? Sempai, how-"

"It's sort of obvious," Deidara scratched the back of his head, focusing on a very interesting spot on the floor. They fell silent again for a moment.

"Then, Sempai, how do you feel?" asked Tobi, gulping nervously. Deidara sighed.

"Tobi, it's not like that, yeah. It's hard," Deidara looked at Tobi pleadingly, knowing Madara was there somewhere.

"Sempai, please, just tell me how you feel," Tobi said. "I promise to listen to you," Deidara looked at Tobi, sizing up the threat. Of course, Tobi wasn't a threat at all, but Madara? How would Madara feel about hearing Deidara's pathetic little emotions? Deidara sighed, knowing that if he told Tobi how he felt, he wouldn't like Madara the next time he decided to come around.

"I don't know, un," Deidara said vaguely.

"Sempai, how do you feel about me?" Tobi asked softly.

"I-" Deidara looked down at his hands. "Tobi, this is really hard for me,"

"Have you ever loved anyone?" Tobi asked.

"I-" Deidara sighed. "I think, un," he mumbled.

"Then how do you feel about me?" pressed Tobi. Deidara looked at him pleadingly.

"I don't know," he sighed, sounding defeated. Tobi sat back.

"Sempai, if you don't feel the same as I do, then-" Tobi was cut off by Deidara standing up and pushing past him. Tobi watched helplessly as Deidara stormed to the door and slammed it shut behind him, wishing with all his heart that he hadn't pressed so hard. Deidara was just confused, and Tobi wasn't making it any better. Tobi leaned against the bed, close to tears. He had probably just lost his chance at winning Deidara's heart.

* * *

Deidara stormed down the hall, more angry at himself than Tobi. 'Oh, sure, you wait for a sign. And Tobi comes right out and give is to you, like he can read your mind or something, and you blow it!' Deidara kicked a wall, disregarding the fact that any pressure could collapse the whole building. 'You coward, you want to know what Tobi's thinking, and he tells you! Then you can't even look him in the eye, you worthless piece of-' Deidara sighed and sent his fist through another wall. 'It's Madara,' he thought venomously. 'if Tobi weren't some sort of carrier thing for Madara, then it would be easier,'. Somewhere, though, in the back of his mind, Deidara knew that was a lie. Deidara knew he couldn't stand Tobi just as Tobi, but with Madara it seemed nearly perfect.

Deidara sighed loudly again, continuing on his way down the hall and soon found himself in the shitty excuse for a lobby. He looked around, noting all the shady characters lounging around. Knowing he could easily defend himself against any number of them, he left the lobby and down the walkway leading to the road. 'I can't believe this is happening,' he thought in an epiphany. 'To think I was fated not to love or receive love, and now, here I am, in love and loved.'

* * *

Deidara hadn't come back to the room, and it had already been a half an hour. Tobi was worried. Maybe the situation was more serious than he had at first thought, maybe Deidara was more mentally unstable than he had thought. Once this thought struck him, Tobi was up on a flash and out the door. He hurried through the halls, looking for any sign of Deidara. The hole in the wall was either an indication that Deidara was mad, or that the they seriously picked the wrong hotel. Tobi hoped it was the latter as he hurried down the hall.

Tobi ran through the lobby, and sighed in relief when he found Deidara outside. But Deidara didn't see Tobi, he was busy arguing with someone. This someone was a woman who looked quite intimidating and was holding a boomerang like weapon. And she didn't look happy. Just as Deidara said something nasty, Tobi couldn't hear it, Tobi called out "Sempai!" Deidara turned, and at exactly that moment the woman chose to attack, throwing her weapon and slicing through a beam that was holding up the overhang Deidara was standing under. "No!" Tobi screamed, and with nearly inhuman speed he was standing next to Deidara in less than a split second. Without any intelligible thought, Tobi pushed Deidara out from under the falling roof, but was trapped under it himself. As blackness faded around his vision, Tobi knew he was going to die. His spine had snapped. But, at least, he had told Deidara how he felt and saved him. That was all that mattered. . .

* * *

Tobi awoke in a warm, light colored place. He looked around. He thought: 'I must be dead,'. He couldn't see anything solid, but all around him he heard loving whispers. It seemed as if crowds of people were trying to tell him how much they adored him, or how proud they were of him, all at once. Tobi grinned, and put a hand to his face. No mask. He looked around, still seeing nothing but light. He decided it wouldn't be terrible being dead. The whispers were becoming more and more jumbled, though, as soon as he tried to hear exactly what they were saying. Frowning, he sat down on the seemingly solid ground. Being dead sure was confusing. And as the minutes wore on, he found he was forgetting why he wouldn't want to be dead in the first place. Then it hit him. He had to go back to being alive for Deidara! Tobi leapt up, searching around for a way to get out of this place. The whispers changed to a more soothing, sympathetic tone. Tobi looked around wildly, hoping to either see the source of the whispers or the exit. Suddenly, a voice stood out to him. He couldn't quite make out what it said, but he recognized it. "What did you say, Deidara-sempai?" he called out.

"I said shut the fuck up, dumb ass," Suddenly, Tobi was not in that strange, whispering place. He was face down, without his mask, in the dirt. And but his body was numb.

"Sempai?"

"Nah, Itachi. Who else were you expecting?"

"Am I dead?"

"You better not be, after all I've been doing,"

"Sempai?"

"Shut the fuck up! If you move another inch you could die. You don't feel it, but you broke your spine. Do you know how hard it is to fix a spine? Jeez, couldn't you have broken like, a leg or something, yeah?" Tobi grinned against the earth. Deidara was worried.


	9. The Chosen One

IMPORTANT NOTICE: In case you haven't heard, this story is a piece of shit. And so is anything else I wrote for . Anyhow, I wish you to check out WhirledPeace at , because that shit is NOT junk! If you REALLY love me, you'll read my stories! (ok, I'm just yearning for real feedback, because my mom is REALLY SUPER busy, and doesn't have time to read my stories.) Apologies for the last chapter, but I promise some actually well-written stories on my other account. THANKS! I LOVE YOU ALL!

* * *

"Sempai, what happened?" asked Tobi after a long silent moment.

"Don't you remember? You saved me, stupidly, and got hit by a falling roof, hmm,"

"I remember going to save you, but that's it,"

"You obviously hit your head, then, un. Now be still, this is quite tricky," Tobi did his best to be still, after hearing how unsurely Deidara had said it.

"What happened to that woman?"

"She's more of a girl, a teenager, un. She's from my old village, and since her father's death I think she's a queen or something," Deidara replied. "She doesn't matter, though. I could've handled her. But she almost killed you, which isn't good," Deidara sighed.

"What happened to her?"

"She's dead. Along with everyone else in the vicinity, and anyone who happened to be in the hotel," Deidara said.

"Why?"

"I got pissed and blew everything up. Then I dragged you into the forest, which is where we are now, un. Now I'm under the gun trying to do this, and let's face it, the gun's loaded,"

"I had a dream, that I was dead. All these people were saying nice things, and then you were there,"

"I was dead?"

"No, you were trying to bring me back,"

"What do you think I've been doing for the past day?"

"A whole day?"

"What did you expect? You broke your spine, un! Now stay still, this might hurt a bit," Tobi felt Deidara's hands at his mouth, pressing a rag between his teeth. Tobi bit down on it, wondering what exactly was going on. At first no feeling came, then a dull ache slowly spread through Tobi's entire back. And then an icy, piercing pain shot through him, making him cry out. "Stay still, un," Deidara commanded. Tobi did his best, trying to occupy his mind by biting on the rag. "Sorry if it hurts, I'm not very good at his," Tobi detected a hint of fear in Deidara's voice, but couldn't assure his partner because of the rag in his mouth. Tobi felt a stabbing sensation in his lower back, and then the piercing pain faded to a mild ache. "Does it still hurt?" asked Deidara. Tobi did his best to shake his head, and mumbled a negative against the rag in his mouth. Deidara removed the rag from Tobi's mouth and sat back, sighing. Tobi thought it was over, but he was as wrong as America's energy policy. "I can't believe you would do such a stupid thing! I would've been fine, but no, you had to go and nearly get yourself killed! I can't even begin to fathom the amount stupidity in your tiny, tiny brain!" Tobi winced slightly. Deidara sighed and waited a second.

"If I wasn't nearly in two pieces, I would make sure you never said anything that rude again," Madara said.

"It wasn't rude, it was fact," Deidara retorted crossly.

"You forget who you're dealing with,"

"I have two facts, though. One: you can't move a bone in your body below the neck. Two: you don't have a head injury," There was a long silence. Madara seemed lost for words.

"What is that supposed to mean?" Madara demanded, thought they both knew what it meant.

"What do you think?" Deidara snorted. "I think it's about time we had a little chat, don't you think, hmm? And what time would be better than the present, when you can't jump up and strangle me, un?"

"Once this little injury is better, I swear Deidara, I'll-"

"Who's the one who saved you, un? Anyway, I promise not to insult you again, yeah. Better?" Madara grumbled. "Well then. I'm sick of these little games, all right? I just want it straight out, in the open. I don't care anymore," there was a long silence.

"Do you think this is really the time?" asked Madara. Deidara rolled his eye.

"If I didn't, do you think I'd be saying this? I like talking to people when they don't try to kill me,"

"Maybe if you learned to hold your tongue people wouldn't want to kill you," Madara replied. Deidara laughed.

"Maybe," he said. "but I won't. I prefer the freedom of speech, un,"

"Even if you can't talk right," Madara muttered. Deidara sighed.

"Madara, to be honest, you're not making things any easier,"

"Don't patronize me!" shrieked Madara.

"Look, once we get all this bothersome talking out of the way, and once your injury heals, you can patronize me all you want. Sound fair?" Madara grumbled. Deidara sighed. "My patience is running out as well, Madara. Why don't you just swallow your pride, and tell me what the hell is going on, hmm?" Madara stayed silent. Deidara sighed. "Once your injury heals, then,"

* * *

Within two days of healing, Tobi was almost completely fine. Deidara told Tobi that he had blacked out and missed the rest of his rant, but also that it wasn't very important. Deidara's little lie, which Tobi had no idea was a lie, brought up the issue of Tobi and Madara ever meeting. What would happen if Deidara told Tobi about Madara? Would Madara help out, or did he want it to stay a secret? Would they interact, or would Madara just find another host? Deidara now found another source of confusion. How would he feel if Madara left him alone with Tobi? Would he still feel, well, the same way he did now, or would that change? Would he miss Madara? This was all too complicated. He had only known Madara a few days, and he was already too attached. A killer wasn't supposed to get so attached.

But, Deidara decided, a killer didn't run from anything but the law. So he was going to face the very cause of all frustration and confusion in his life, and he'd do it calmly. This was going to be harder than killing people.

"Deidara-chan," came the voice that was unmistakably Madara's.

"Finally ready to talk, now that you're all back to normal and can strangle me at a moment's notice?" asked Deidara, slightly angered by Madara's refusal to talk before. Madara sighed.

"You can't tell me what to do," he said, looming over Deidara. "but I can tell you what to do. Tobi is too shy to tell you. He loves you, and I know you like him,"

"How can you be so sure how I feel, un?" demanded Deidara. Madara chuckled, stepping closer to Deidara. Deidara did not step back.

"You saved him, didn't you? If he was as much as a pest as you claim, why not let him die?" asked Madara. Deidara gulped thickly.

"So what?" he asked defiantly. "So what if I don't want him to die?"

"You're a killer, Deidara. Wanting someone to die is your natural state of being," Madara grinned evilly. "So what made you not want him dead?" Deidara gaped like a fish for a moment, but then regained his wits.

"I don't want to have to carry the scroll all the way back to base," Deidara replied.

"Deidara, you're not going to get a scroll. You're going to negotiate for land," Madara pointed out. Deidara crossed his arms across his chest, and mentally slapped himself.

"I don't want to, so I was going to make Tobi do it, yeah," Deidara closed his hands into fists as the tongues on his hands began licking at his sweaty palms. Madara noticed this.

"Angry?" he asked, chuckling, taking another step towards Deidara. Deidara didn't move. Madara was now standing above him, mouth bared in a dangerous grin, eyes looking almost murderous. Deidara smirked.

"Angry? No, I'm not angry," Deidara crossed his arms loosely over his chest, tilting his hips. "You may threaten and intimidate me all you want, but I know I have something you don't," Madara quirked an eyebrow, not exactly liking Deidara's cockiness.

"What?" he demanded.

"I can admit to my own feelings. I like Tobi," Madara gaped in silence, staring slack jawed at Deidara. Deidara smirked, and reached up to pat Madara's cheek. "How's that, hmm?" Madara snatched Deidara's wrist, glaring at the blond artist.

"So he's the one you choose?" Madara asked. Deidara nodded, expecting his wrist to be broken like his other one. Madara was looking at him intensely now, keeping his wrist in a firm grip. Madara chuckled. "I see. And who do you think is the one I choose?" Deidara's eyes widened.

"What?" he asked.

"Deidara, I want you to listen very carefully. I will only say this once: I don't want to kill you," There was a long silence, in which they both looked into each other's eyes.

"Why is Tobi holding Sempai's hand?" Tobi asked. Deidara sighed and drew his hand back.

"Because- oh, don't you- ah, forget it," Deidara turned from Tobi. "I- I'm going to get some sleep. You should too," Deidara flopped down on the ground, his head on his arms. Tobi sighed and lay down on the other side of the camp. It was evident Deidara didn't want to be bothered. But, for all it was worth, Tobi felt they were a step closer to each other.


	10. A World Unseen

**A/N: Check out my story, Smirnoff, if you're reading this you might like it:** /s/2566594/1/Smirnoff

**Tell me what you want to see happen! Please review, or else I'll think no one's reading it and not post any new chapters! So let me know you're alive.**

* * *

/Tobi. . ./

Tobi shot awake, sitting up and looking around. His breathing calmed, and he looked to his left where Deidara was still fast asleep. Tobi smiled slightly, calmed by the sight of his sleeping Sempai. As he watched, Deidara smiled as well. Then laughed. Tobi frowned. He had never heard Deidara laugh like that. He'd only ever heard Deidara's maniacal laughter. This was sweeter. Tobi then realized that Deidara's hand mouths were licking his palms. He must be tickled. It then hit Tobi that, with Deidara asleep and definitely not talking, no one was around to call his name. Then it came again.

/Tobi. . ./

Tobi looked around. He couldn't tell where the voice was coming from. "Who's there?" he called into the dark. No one answered. Tobi coughed, then tried again. "Who's there?" he asked, louder this time. Deidara groaned and looked over at Tobi, visible eye still closed.

"No one but us, Tobi," he said in a sleep slurred voice.

"I heard someone call my name," Tobi insisted.

"Don't go schizophrenic on me, Tobi. Go back to sleep," Deidara rolled over onto his side. Tobi sighed. Maybe it was just all this stress that he had been under for the past week or so. Yawning, he was just about to lay down when it came again. Except it wasn't his name.

/Now that we've gotten that panic attack out of the way, there are some things we need to discuss./

Tobi nearly jumped out of his skin. He looked all around, eyes searching desperately for someone. He found no one. "Where are you?" he whispered.

/Essentially, I'm in your mind. But don't think I'm not real./

Tobi flopped back down onto the ground. "Oh, great, how on earth can you be real?" whispered Tobi.

/Please, there's no need to speak. Simply think what you wish to say to me, and I'll hear it./ Tobi sighed.

'All right. Like this?'

/Yes. Now, I should probably tell you who I am. I am Madara, the founder of the Uchiha clan./

'And what are you doing in my head? Wait- how long have you been there?!'

/Ahem. Allow me to explain everything. Just sit back, and let me talk. I didn't want to die, if that makes any sense. So, as an unknown power of the Sharingan, I am able to take over their body, and sort of use their body as my own./

'Wait- you mean I don't have Sharingan because of you?'

/No. I found you like that. Now, if you'll allow me to continue-/

'Where did you find me?'

/Sigh. Will you just be quiet for one minute and let me finish?/ silence. /Good. I found you near a rock slide, knocked out. I saw you had the Sharingan, and chose you to be my, er, host. I used your body for a few years, and I still don't know who you were. But then I found a member of Akatsuki, Zetsu, and I let you take over, just to see who you were. All this time I've been looking for clues, and I can't find any. I only come out now and then, and those are the times you can't remember. Like that first night, when you killed the ANBU, that was me. And then that night Deidara broke his wrist, that was actually me./

'You broke his wrist?!'

/Yes, I did. Now shut up. There are three states that we can exist in. The first is you being you, with me watching. The second is me being me, without you watching. The third is you being you, with me talking to you. Does that make sense? Of course it does. Now, I'm only telling you about all of this for two reasons: one, is that it was getting confusing and frustrating for Deidara to keep lying to you just to cover up for me. You'd think for a killer he'd be a better liar, that owl thing was priceless./

'What's the second reason?'

/What? Oh, right. I had a very interesting conversation with Deidara last night. . ./

* * *

The next morning Deidara found Tobi leaning against a tree, absorbed in his thoughts. Deidara didn't like thinking too hard in the morning, but after a minute of thought he came to the conclusion Madara had shown himself. Keeping his real eye closed, Deidara watched Tobi. Tobi stayed perfectly still, then sighed. "Deidara-chan, I know you're awake," Maybe it wasn't Tobi.

"What're you doing? Where's Tobi?" asked Deidara. Madara shook his head.

"He needs his sleep, he was up all night talking to me,"

"So you finally showed yourself to him?" Deidara asked softly.

"Yes, Deidara," Madara drawled, looking down at the artist. Deidara gulped.

"Do you know who he is?" Deidara sounded slightly hopeful, but still scared of the answer. Madara sighed, shaking his head slowly.

"No. I found him, that's all. But I just wanted to warn you, Deidara, I told him about our conversation last night," Deidara's eyes widened.

"Did you tell him about your part in it?" he asked mischievously. "Tobi might not like that,"

"Baka," muttered Madara, standing up. There was silence.

"Sempai?" Tobi's innocent voice came. Deidara sighed and stood up, facing Tobi.

"Yes, un?" he said tiredly. Tobi looked frightened.

"Sempai, was- was- was Madara just talking to you?"

"Yah, un. What of it?"

"Oh, well. . ." Tobi gulped. "He told me that he broke your wrist. I- I was scared he hurt you again," Deidara blinked up at Tobi in confusion.

"No, I'm fine, Tobi," Deidara said, still slightly confused. Then he sighed, shaking his blond head. "Madara told you about our conversation, didn't he?" Tobi nodded.

"He also told me about all the other things that happened," Tobi added, hoping that they were only going to talk about Madara in general, not about what Madara did yesterday.

"Yeah, sure. What did you think about our conversation yesterday?" Deidara sounded slightly awkward. Tobi realized they were both about as awkward and embarrassed about their feelings. It was actually a huge leap for Deidara to be able to talk civilly with anyone, let alone someone he had feelings for.

"I think we might have a strange love triangle on our hands," Tobi said jokingly. Deidara's eye widened.

"What?" he asked.

"Well, I like you, you like me, and Madara likes you!"

/Watch it, kid./ Tobi ignored the voice in his head. Deidara looked utterly lost. He coughed.

"Um, well, yeah. . ." he said slowly. A large stone dropped into Tobi's stomach. Had he misjudged Deidara's unseen world of complicated emotions and thoughts?

"Did I misunderstand something?" Tobi asked. Deidara shook his head.

"No, you got most of it right, yeah," he said, gulping thickly. "I mean, you like me, I like you, Madara likes me, and I. . ."

"You like Madara, too," Tobi said. Deidara nodded. A tense, anxious silence descended upon them. "I don't see a problem with that, Sempai," Tobi finally said cheerfully. "That just means you like everything about me," Deidara blinked. Just out of curiosity, he directed his mechanical eye at Tobi's head and searched for heat sources. All seemed normal enough, but one could never be too sure.

"Are you serious?" Deidara asked, squinting at Tobi. Tobi nodded.

"Well, if you utterly hated him, you would hate me too, right?"

"Did he tell you that?" Tobi squirmed slightly.

"Um. . .what would you say if I told you he did?"

"I'd tell him right up that I can like one and not the other and not give a shit. Hear that, Madara?"

"Please, Sempai, that's really awkward,"

"Sorry. What on earth did he tell you about me, un?"

"Um. . .a lot of things. He told me about your conversation," Tobi hoped this would prove a fruitful topic. Deidara nodded stiffly.

"About that. . .look, I mean, this is all, well, um, pretty, well, new," Deidara looked up into Tobi's eyes. "I mean, well, uh, I've never really, well, liked someone while they were alive," There was an awkward silence. Deidara coughed.

"But, Sempai, neither have I!" cried Tobi. "Don't you see? I could've been anyone before I lost my memory! So, basically, I'm starting over. I've never liked anyone else, before. Or been liked. Who knows?" Tobi smiled at Deidara. Deidara stared in utter consternation.

"Right," he cleared his throat. "So, technically, you're a virgin?" Tobi blushed a deep red.

"Sempai!" he cried. Deidara felt slightly more confident now that Tobi was embarrassed.

"So are you or not?" he asked.

"You sure do cut to the chase, don't you, Deidara-chan?" chuckled Madara. Deidara blinked.

"Right, you're listening," he said. Madara stepped forward, breathing down on Deidara. Deidara looked up at Madara, and grinned.

"So are you?" he asked slyly. Madara grabbed Deidara's hair, smashing their mouths together in a passionate, fiery kiss. When they finally broke their contact, Madara smirked evilly down at Deidara.

"Answer enough?" he asked, grasping Deidara strongly around the waist, bringing their bodies together. Deidara gasped, Madara's mouth descending on his neck.

"Mmm, Madara, stop," he pleaded halfheartedly. Madara didn't respond, biting harder into the artist's neck. Something snapped in Deidara's brain. He struggled violently, thinking only of getting away. "No! Get off!" he shrieked, pushing against Madara's chest with all his might. Madara reluctantly let go.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" he snapped, irritated his fun had to end. Their eyes met, and in a wild moment Madara witnessed pure, undiluted, absolute fear. But only for a moment, and then Deidara was looking away. Madara didn't stick around. Tobi blinked down at Deidara, who was shaking slightly, looking severely rattled.

"Sempai?" he asked softly, laying a hand on Deidara's shoulder. Deidara slapped the hand away, purely out of instincts. Gulping, Deidara met Tobi's eyes. Yes, they were Tobi's, not Madara's. "What did that bastard do?" asked Tobi.

"Watch your mouth, Tobi," was the only thing Deidara could think to say.

"Sempai, what the hell did he do? I hate that the second we find each other he has to ruin it! I can't do anything about what he does to you, I can't help you! I can't even see what happens. Sempai, I don't want you hurt, but- but- Sempai I want to protect you!" Tobi gasped, and was close to pre-tears breathing. Deidara stared for a moment, then wrapped his thin arms around Tobi's chest, pressing his head to Tobi's shoulder.

"It's all right, Tobi. It wasn't Madara's fault," he whispered.

"Then who hurt you, Deidara?" Deidara didn't comment on Tobi's lack of honorific. "I swear, I-"

"Shh, Tobi. They're long dead," Deidara hoped speaking calmly would have the same effect on Tobi. It worked.

"I'm sorry, Sempai," Tobi apologized.

"It's all right," Deidara said, not letting go. They stood like that for a moment.

"I'm calm now, Sempai, you don't have to hold onto me," Tobi said quietly. Deidara shook his head, burying his head further into Tobi's shoulder.

"I have to, Tobi," Deidara replied. "I have to."

* * *

**A/N: Remember to review, or else I won't know you read it! Tell me how to improve, too! I'll take any ideas right now. (though I have my own for the trampoline and city wall, look up the lyrics and tell me how to do anything after that.) Here's a link to the song 'Read My Mind', the lyrics:**

/read-my-mind-lyrics-the-killers.html

Thank you for reading!


	11. A City Wall and a Trampoline

A/N: I should probably alert you of my policy: three reviews for the last chapter before I update. I sometimes break this rule, but I mostly live by it. I do this only so I don't post too many chapters at once, I know I hate it when people do that, and so that if someone has something to say about the next chapter they can be heard. So know that your review counts!

* * *

It had been an hour since Madara had made his move on Deidara. Tobi and Deidara had sat next to each other, leaning against a tree. And neither had said a word. Deidara had been brooding, and Tobi had been worrying, and thus they were each caught up in their own thoughts. Finally, Tobi being Tobi, the silence was broken.

"What did Madara do to you?" he asked. Deidara looked up.

"Nothing wrong, un," Deidara replied. "he just made a move is all, un,"

"He must've done something worse, Sempai. Why were you so shaken up?" Deidara sighed.

"It's complicated, Tobi," Deidara looked over at Tobi.

"Sempai, please," Tobi sounded a bit more desperate now. It suddenly dawned on Deidara how it felt to be Tobi. Tobi knew Deidara was hurt by something that was inside of him, something he couldn't prevent from hurting Deidara. How powerless Tobi must feel, and then not even knowing how Deidara was hurt, it must be tough. Deidara felt suddenly selfish.

"I'm sorry," he whispered. "I've never told anyone really what happened," Gently, subtly, Tobi entwined his fingers in Deidara's.

"I don't mind being the first," he said firmly. "I just want to help," Deidara looked into his eyes.

"I know, Tobi," he said.

/For the love of everything painful and unholy, just get to the fucking point!/ Tobi ignored Madara. One thing Tobi was soon to find out was that Madara didn't like being ignored.

"Madara's talking, isn't he?" asked Deidara. Tobi nodded. Deidara sighed, taking his hand back and rubbing his temples. "I'm being such a baby about the whole thing. I don't know why I panicked, it was just sort of instincts,"

"Were you raped?!" Tobi cried.

/And the genius makes his appearance. It took you that long to-/

'Shut it, Madara. You may not be worried about Deidara-san, but I am.' Tobi had expected a harsh reply, an insult, or perhaps to wake up in great amounts of pain, but instead he was greeted merely with silence. Distracted by his mental conversation, Tobi missed Deidara's curt nod. But, understanding that Madara was causing trouble, he gave his verbal answer.

"Yes," he said softly. He then shook his head, as if to clear it. "Jeez, I sound like some teenage girl,"

"This is serious Sempai," Tobi said. Deidara shook his head.

"You're making a big deal out of nothing. It doesn't matter," Deidara looked off in a completely Tobi-less direction.

/See? Meddling only makes him mad. Better to just live without sex./

'This isn't about sex, Madara. It's about you scaring Deidara, and why he got scared. Unlike you, I'd like to keep Deidara from getting spooked like that.'

/You make him sound like a horse./

'I bet that's all he is to you, something to be-'

/Say it and I will hurt you. What's with this sudden rebellion?/

'You scared Deidara, and you don't even care!' Tobi was again greeted with silence. Sighing aloud, Tobi turned his attention again to Deidara. Unfortunately, Deidara was not doing the same to Tobi.

"Sem-"

"I don't want to talk about it," Deidara snapped. "Just drop it," Tobi almost cried. All this, to have come so far, to have gotten past the majority of Deidara's maze-like heart, and only to be blocked by the wall. The city of Deidara's emotions and true self was blocked by this single wall of memories. A single city wall, blocking him.

Thirty minutes later, Deidara broke the silence. "It's not just that," he said so softly that Tobi almost didn't hear. Scared of scaring Deidara, Tobi kept his mouth shut and let his partner continue. "Sure, I was r-raped by those Konoha ninjas, but wasn't it the same with Sasori? He wanted something, and he took it, and I was just willing. After I was raped, I kept wondering what would've happened if I wasn't willing. Who would've cared, besides me? If I got distracted by him during a mission and we failed, it would be my fault, not his. Danna would've raped me, too. He was no better than those bastards," Deidara took a shaky breath. "So is Madara the same?" Tobi gasped. Was Madara the same? He could tell Madara was surprised as well.

/This is too complicated./ Madara sighed. /Didn't it used to be where two people liked each other, got together, made babies, and died?/

'You're so old fashioned. And this isn't two people, it's three. What do you want me to tell him? Are you the same?'

/Of course not! And I'm pretty sure Deidara knows that. Tell him he's being a baby about the whole thing and should grow up. This is taking forever to get past his stupid emotions./

"Madara was worried," Tobi said.

/I was not!/ "And he still has his pride. But, Deidara, I don't think Madara is the same. You asked him to stop, didn't you? And he stopped, didn't he? He likes you to respect him, but he doesn't want to hurt you,"

/Make that hurt him too badly./ Tobi ignored Madara. "Sempai, I know he would never see it himself, but you're special to him,"

/No he's not. Stop making stuff up./

'Stop being so proud. Deidara's hurting, can't you see?'

/Of course I can see, that's why I'm staying put and not handling this my own way./

'And what way would that be?' Silence. Tobi sighed and turned his attention back to Deidara. Luckily, Deidara's shock had given him time to have his little conversation with Madara.

"I knew I freaked for nothing," Deidara said, and gave Tobi a smile. A warm smile. A happy smile. A purely Deidara smile.

It was like they had been bouncing on a trampoline, and whenever Tobi was up Deidara was down, and vice versa. But now they were in unison, synced together. And neither minded, because the other didn't mind. And together, they shone, whereas alone they had sputtered out. Finally, after all this struggling, they were together.

* * *

The rest of the mission, surprisingly, was uneventful. Deidara healed his wrist, Madara refusing to help as he had done with Tobi's spine. They secured the deal on the land Pein has been promised, Madara not interfering. Well, in reality Tobi had to stay hidden in case someone recognized his Sharingan. The mission was easy, as Deidara had expected for a first mission. And it didn't take that long to get back to Akatsuki HQ. But, of course, with Deidara, Madara, and Tobi all in one place, things couldn't stay uneventful for long.

* * *

A/N: Very short, but I wanted to end with a sort of nice note. Chaos in the next chapter, though. Hey, tell me if you like this idea: Tobi the matchmaker! Ok, I know it's stupid, but you know all those dA pictures about him walking in on Sasori and Deidara? I got this idea where Tobi sets up all the Akatsuki couples, including Pein and Konan! Tell me I'm an idiot, please!


	12. I Don't Mind waiting

* * *

A/N: Right, I know this is late, but some of us have to go to school you know. During the summer I pretty much got the hang of biking on the right side of the road, but once school started it all went out the window. I'm lucky to be alive.

* * *

Tobi and Deidara arrived at the hideout. Tobi had his cloak over his face, and Deidara was letting him know exactly what he thought of that. "It's not like you're ugly, un, or anything like that. And if you say the only reason you were hiding your face from me was because you had Sharingan, why bother now?"

"Sempai, if Itachi sees there's going to be trouble. What if he tries to kill me?"

"Madara wouldn't let that happen," Deidara pointed out.

/Tell the brat to keep his mouth shut about me, or else./

"Deidara, Madara says he doesn't want anyone to know about him,"

"Oh, right. But you don't have his face, you have your own, so-"

"Sempai, I just don't want to cause trouble. It's easier this way," Tobi explained. Deidara huffed but didn't pursue the matter. They entered the HQ, no one saying anything. Deidara allowed Tobi to head for their room, while he went to Leader's office to report on their mission. He knocked lightly on the door.

"Come in," Pein said. Deidara opened the door and seated himself before Pein. "I take it your mission was a success?"

"Hai, Leader-sama," Deidara said. Pein raised an eyebrow.

"I see. Did Tobi perform adequately?"

"Hai," Deidara confirmed. Pein nodded. "Leader-sama, I have a question for you," Pein raised an eyebrow. "Why am I here? I don't want to be here, I was forced to by Itacih, and you told me I was the most useless member. Why haven't you just done away with me, if I'm so useless?" Pein sighed, rubbing his temples.

"Telling you would only effect your fighting skills," he said.

"Hey, I think sticking me with Tobi would've effected my fighting skills a little more than your damn secret, un," Pein sighed.

"I'm not going to. I can just order you out of this room immediately, or kill you. You don't matter," Deidara sighed.

"I think I do, or at least did. How do you know keeping it a secret won't effect me, hmm?"

"Itachi wanted to, all right? I don't know, but he seemed adamant about it. And we needed someone to replace Orochimaru,"

"So if Itachi wanted me, why was I Sasori's partner?" Deidara asked, glaring at Pein. Pein sighed.

"Because Sasori wanted to. Itachi wanted you in the organization, but Sasori wanted to be your partner,"

"What?!" Deidara cried, lurching to his feet. "He was always complaining and telling me it wasn't his idea. He didn't want to be my partner any more than I wanted to be his!"

"Calm down! I knew this was a bad idea. I didn't know what Sasori wanted you for, I'd say he just wanted to fuck you, which he could've done if you were Itachi's partner, anyway. But all I know is that he wanted you as his partner, and even threatened Itachi,"

"He threatened Itachi? Was he stupid? He was made of wood!"

"Deidara, please, shut up before I make you. He threatened Itachi, and Itachi gave in, for some reason,"

"So why is Tobi my partner, un? Why not Itachi?"

"Because Itachi has a partner,"

"Leader-sama, this doesn't make sense, un,"

"Itachi didn't want you as a partner, he wanted you in the organization. Sasori wanted you as a partner," Pein said. "Now, I'm quite irritated, so get on with your mission report,"

* * *

Tobi was desperately searching for his mask. He was sure he had hidden one in the room, but then he remembered what had happened before the mission. Now he was looking for something to cover his face for the amount of time it would take him to make another one. He had just turned away from a pillowcase, when he heard someone open the door. "Sempai-" Tobi turned and saw it wasn't his Sempai. "Itachi-san?" he asked. Itachi was leaning against the doorway, eyeing Tobi with cool, black eyes.

"I did as you asked, Madara," he said. Madara chuckled.

"Yes, you certainly did," he said, grinning evilly. Itachi stepped into the room.

"So, now that you're here, is my mission done? I created an opening in the organization, twice now,"

"You got rid of Sasori?" Madara asked.

"In a way," Itachi sighed. "I made him want to die. The second he realized he had the option of loosing, he lost, and died,"

"Ah, such subtleties only an Uchiha could be capable of," Madara stepped closer to Itachi. Their eyes met, Sharingan to Sharingan.

"You promised," Itachi breathed. "You promised to train me, if I did as you bid," Madara chuckled, nodding his head as if he were humoring Itachi.

"Yes, I promised to train you if you created an opening in Akatsuki. This you did. You went the extra step and told Pein-san about Tobi acting as my host. You should get what you asked for," Madara grinned maniacally down at Itachi. "But why should I keep my promise? After all, as one villain to the next, you should learn not to trust anyone so easily," Itachi's eyes widened, and then he glared at Madara.

"You promised," he said, then realized how childish he sounded. "Who do you think told Kisame to tell Tobi Deidara wasn't in the room? Who convinced Leader-sama to train Tobi? Who told him to give you so much time for an easy mission? Can you be so heartless?"

"Itachi, I thought you were a killer," Madara scolded.

"I am not a killer," Itachi growled. "You know that,"

"Of course," Madara drawled. "I guess I'll humor you then," Madara lifted his hand and caressed Itachi's cheek, just as the door burst open. Madara didn't even have the decency to remove his hand from Itachi's face. Deidara stared for a moment.

"Jerk, un," he muttered, slamming the door.

"Leave, now," Madara ordered. Itachi sighed and did as Madara bid. Madara retreated into Tobi's mind.

/Deidara's mad at us./ he said.

'You mean you,' accused Tobi. 'What did you do now?'

/I was only playing with Itachi's mind, when-/

'Madara, shut up. You have to ruin everything once I've got things almost better. You know what? Just stay put. Let me handle this. If we get attacked by ANBU, that's your field. But please, you have no fucking clue of how a human's emotions work.' Madara made no reply. Tobi sighed, hurrying out of the room and looking for Deidara.

* * *

Deidara let the wind run through his hair. Icing in the cake, he thought, icing on the cake. I find out about some strange love triangle from my boss, of all people, I loose all respect for my boss and Itachi, and suddenly I find Madara with his hands all over Itachi. Welcome home. Deidara lay down, his hair splayed out around him. 'You're a looser. You actually thought Madara might not actually hate you. He's a desperate octogenarian, you think he wouldn't be desperate? Sure, Tobi liked him, but what did it matter? Deidara didn't even know if he would be able to have sex, if too many bad memories would arise to allow him one last moment of happiness. Deidara looked up at the sky. It was night? Of course it was night. How stupid. The stars were out, winking and twinkling in a gloomy, far-off sort of way. Deidara sighed again. 'Kill yourself? Good idea. Just go blow out Madara's brains.' he thought. 'But only because he- only because he took over Tobi's body. Tobi wants his own body.' Deidara sighed angrily, closing his eye. 'Yeah right, you coward.'

* * *

Tobi saw Deidara laying on the ground, seemingly asleep. Quietly, Tobi began to walk towards him. When he was only a few yards from the artists, Deidara spoke. "I can see you, dimwit," he said, as if nothing was wrong.

"Oh," Tobi said, trudging over to Deidara and sitting beside him. Deidara sat up as well.

"Tobi, I'm not mad at you," Deidara said.

"I know, Sempai," Tobi sighed. "You're mad at Madara,"

"No I'm not!" Deidara cried indignantly. "I'm mad at myself, for believing him," Tobi gulped, and reached out, touching Deidara's shoulder lightly. Deidara didn't flinch. Almost cautiously, Tobi pulled Deidara to his chest, hugging his smaller body.

"Sempai, you know it's not your fault," he whispered into Deidara's blond locks. Deidara mumbled something, but Tobi knew it meant nothing. "Deidara-san-"

"Do you want to call me Dei-chan?" Deidara demanded suddenly. Tobi floundered for a moment.

"Well, um, I sort of wanted to. . .but I never would've- only in my head-" as soon as Tobi said this last part, Deidara gave a shaky smile, laying his head tentatively on Tobi's shoulder. "What was that?"

"That was a question, stupid," Deidara muttered. Tobi tentatively let his hands slide lower on Deidara's back. Deidara leaned into his touch, humming slightly. Tobi brought a hand to Deidara's hair, stroking it lovingly, then caressing Deidara's cheek. Deidara turned his head, and lurched up into Tobi's mouth. Shocked, it took Tobi a moment to respond, but when he finally did, what a kiss it was. Teeth, gums, and tongues went into a passionate battle, entwining and mixing. Tobi's hands found themselves on Deidara's ass, Deidara's hands had licked their way to grasp Tobi's hair. Tobi pushed Deidara back, straddling him. Suddenly, Deidara broke their kiss and looked at Tobi with wide eyes. Tobi understood, and backed off, rolling to the side. Deidara lay back, closing his eye tightly. He threw an arm across his eyes, growling slightly. Tobi suddenly realized something was seriously wrong.

"Dei-chan?" he asked, tentatively placing a hand on Deidara's shoulder. Deidara flinched away, then stopped himself. He looked over at Tobi.

"I'm sorry," he whispered, rubbing his thumb over his mechanical eye.

"Dei-chan, what happened?" Tobi asked. Deidara drew a shaky breath.

"This damn eye," he muttered. "It- it took pictures,"

"Of right now?"

"No, of. . ." Deidara sighed. "It needs to remind me. Until I-" Deidara coughed. "Until I can overcome those pictures, I-" Tobi nodded. He picked Deidara up, sitting cross legged and sitting the artist in his lap. Deidara was stiff at first, and Tobi got the feeling it wasn't the things that had happened to him in the past, it was the things that had never happened.

"The stars are pretty tonight, Sempai," Tobi whispered.

"Hmm. Sure are," Deidara agreed, relaxing slightly.

"Your hair smells like pines," Tobi noted. "I like that," Tobi sensed Deidara's confusion.

"You smell like somewhere else," Deidara said after a moment's pause. "I like that,"


	13. It Won't Shine

A/N: I promise this chapter will be 'coolies'! I appreciate all your reviews!

* * *

Tobi woke up the next morning wondering why he was outside. Once he stopped wondering that, he started wondering why he wasn't cold. It then occurred to him that he had fallen asleep outside with Deidara last night. Two mysteries solved, not bad for first thing in the morning. Tobi looked around, and felt the need to stretch. He slipped gently out from under Deidara and stood up. Tobi stretched his arms over his head and stretched, his muscles taut under his clothing. He then realized his cloak wasn't on him. Surprised, he looked back at Deidara, who was happily snuggled in his cloak. Tobi smiled down at the artist. Deidara mumbled something. "What was that, Sempai?" he asked, bending over.

"I said stupid fucking piece of shit, hmm," Deidara replied, sitting up and fiddling with his mechanical eye. Tobi smiled and shook his head.

"Good morning," he said.

"Right, good morning," Deidara coughed, regular eye closed as he focused all his attention on the mechanical one. Finally he gave up and let his hands fall into his lap. He looked up at Tobi, and an awkward silence fell on the two. Deidara coughed again. "It wasn't very cold last night, was it, un?" Tobi shook his head.

"Nope, I guess we kept each other warm," he said, standing up. "Come on, let's get some breakfast. Does cereal sound good?" Tobi held a hand out to help Deidara stand. Tentatively, the artist took it and hoisted himself up.

"I don't mind if you don't mind," Deidara replied. Together, they walked back to HQ.

* * *

Tobi and Deidara sat in their room, a bowl of cereal in each of their laps. Deidara knew Tobi was talking to Madara, and ate in silence.

'You never notice anything. All you care about is satisfying your sick, perverted needs.'

/I do too notice things!/ Madara replied.

'You sound like a kid. And when was the last time you noticed anything?'

/I notice how little Deidara eats./ Madara retorted. Tobi faltered, glancing at the artist. Deidara was staring off into space, but the bowl in his hands wasn't very large, nor overly filled with cereal.

'You just noticed that right now. What about before?'

/I noticed that Deidara didn't want to be touched that one time, remember?/

'That was sort of obvious, Madara.'

/I noticed and pointed out the athelas to Deidara./

'Madara, have you ever noticed how the things you say make Deidara feel?' asked Tobi. Madara stayed silent for a long while. 'Madara, maybe no one's ever taught you to be anything but a killer. Has anyone ever showed you how to be nice?'

/The fuck, Tobi?/

'I see. Well, this morning, Deidara felt a bit awkward, because of something that happened last night. Now, if I had brought that up, it wouldn't have made him feel any better. But by changing the subject, and saying something mostly neutral, I was able to distract him from that and he ended up feeling a little better. Did that make sense?' Madara grumbled. Tobi sighed aloud. Deidara looked up.

"Making any progress, un?" he asked. Tobi shook his head.

"Madara is too proud,"

"I know, un," Deidara looked down at his bowl, then set it off to the side. Tobi made a mental note of this. Deidara sighed. "Can you ask him why he was touching Itachi?"

/I was only playing with Itachi, nothing more./

'Madara, that's not what Deidara wants to hear. He wants to know what feelings made you reach out to Itachi like that.'

/Sadistic ones. Tell him to stop getting his thong in a knot over this./

'Does that mean he's still the one you choose?'

/Where the hell did you get that?/

'Never mind. But Deidara wants to hear that you don't want your little mix-up to change things between you and him. You don't want things to change, do you?/ Silence. Tobi cleared his throat.

"Deidara, um, Madara doesn't really know how to express himself. So I'm going to do it right now," Deidara sat perfectly still. "Madara doesn't really know anything, either, about people and emotions and things. I guess none of us really knows how to act," Tobi scratched the back of his head.

/I swear, once I find a way to use Itachi's body, I will kill you./

'You're going to use Itachi's body?' Silence. 'You know, Orochimaru failed at-'

/Shut up and keep talking to Deidara. He doesn't know why you stopped./ Tobi coughed.

"Madara isn't like that," Deidara sighed. "Of course he knows about all that. Don't try to make everything sound like it's fine, un,"

"Sempai, maybe things are fine," Tobi tried. Deidara said nothing. Tobi realized he had poked a sore spot. Tobi sighed, leaning back. Deidara shook his head, and looked back up at Tobi. "The answer is probably shining right there in front of us, but until we can shine we won't see it," Deidara sighed. 'Don't jump to conclusions,' Tobi hoped. 'Please, if only you could see inside Madara's mind. He might mean harm, but not to you. You don't know what you'd find, Deidara. You have no clue.'

* * *

Deidara and Tobi spent the rest of the time before lunch training. Deidara was still as random, but not as sadistic. He told Tobi to do a certain amount of push ups, then run around those five trees sixteen times. And finally, after a few hours, Deidara consented to a lunch break. And Madara kept silent, all day.

* * *

Deidara and Tobi sat across from each other at the table in the Akatsuki HQ. Tobi had a sandwich before him, and Deidara had nothing. "Hey, Sempai, are you going to ear anything?" Tobi asked. Deidara shook his head.

"Nah, I don't eat lunch, un," he replied.

"You don't eat a lot," Tobi noted. Deidara shrugged.

"I never really did," he said. This was actually the first time someone had pointed this out to him. Looking at his arms, Deidara wondered if it was true. They didn't look overly skinny to him, but then again, compared to others he was a stick. Sitting back, Deidara soon found him lost in the long explanation of why he didn't eat much. Of course, as a kid there hadn't a lot of food to eat in general. Had it just stuck from there? Of course, serial killers didn't eat a lot either, nor did they watch their weight. So what was Tobi trying to say? Deidara was about to voice his questions, when an all too familiar head poked around the corner.

"Deidara-san, Leader-sama wants you in his office," Itachi said emotionlessly. Deidara sighed and stood up.

"I'll be back, hopefully, un," he said, walking down the hall to the office. He had the brains to knock, though.

"Enter," came the voice. Deidara stepped into the office, seating himself in the seat across from Leader.

"So, un, what did you want?" Deidara asked. Leader sighed.

"Deidara, please, I'm not in the mood. Just sit there quietly and let me explain what's going on," Deidara sighed but kept his mouth shut. "All right. I want you and Tobi to go on another mission. You'll be going to Fire Territory to retrieve a scroll for me. It's held at a temple in the middle of the forest. I expect you to be back in a week. Good luck, you may leave,"

". . .the fuck?" Deidara stared at Leader. As was a habit of his he looked closely at Leader's head. Everything seemed in order, but as always, you could never be too sure. "You expect me to find some generic scroll in some generic temple?"

"Exactly. Anything will really do,"

"What in the name of all that is unholy are you trying to pull?" Deidara cried, leaping to his feet. Leader sighed, dropping his head into his hands.

"Please, Deidara, I have a headache. I want you gone for a week. Konan is definitely due in the next week, and I'm sending everyone out. You know what? Come back in a week and a half. I just want you out of my hair for a while. So get going, right now,"

"Holy-"

"If you make up any more cusses then I swear, Deidara-"

"You knocked up Konan?!" Pein sighed.

"Yes, Deidara. Now move your skinny ass before I move it for you,"

"You threatening to rape me?"

"Get. Going. Or. Else."

"Got it," Deidara slipped out of the office, closing the door and leaning against it. Things were moving way too fast. Finally, he regained his composure. "Tobi!" he called. "We're taking a vacation!"

* * *

A/N: don't forget, three reviews! And thank you, I hope this chapter was coolies! (did you know the word 'coolies' is in the fucking dictionary?! Queen Elizabeth, the things I never knew!)


	14. A Detour

A/N: My new word is going to be coolies. I swear. And I didn't notice it before, but lately I've been saying really abnormal things, like 'holy schnauzer in a Christmas tree.' I'm not even Christian! Wow. I know, how about 'holy Madara in a menorah.' Damn, I think we lost our menorah in the move. . . Damn.

* * *

/Tell him-/ Madara started for the fifth time that hour.

'Madara, if you want to tell him something, tell him yourself.' Tobi snapped. 'Just don't kill him.' There was a pause, and it occurred to Tobi to warn Deidara, but then Madara made his appearance.

"We've been walking for four hours. Let's take a break," Madara said. Deidara whirled around, and as he stared at Madara, he seemed to ponder if it was Tobi or not. Finally, though, he sighed.

"Who said I wanted to talk to you, hmm?" he demanded.

"I wanted to talk to you," Madara replied. Deidara rolled his eye.

"Uh-huh. Always about what you want, right?"

"Uh-"

"See? You backed yourself into a corner. What did you want to tell me?"

"I just wanted to know if you truly wanted it to be over before it even began,"

"Me? Who decided it was my fault? Who was the one who decided to start caressing Itachi? I took that as a sign you wanted it over. I mean, who could expect a person like you to stay with a person like me, I mean, we hadn't even barely touched each other. Best to cut it off before it got attached," Deidara crossed his arms over his chest. "That's what you want, right?" Madara looked shamefully at the ground.

"I guess, with your past, it would be hard for me to ever simply allude to how I feel,"

"If you tell me what you want, I swear I'll smack you," Deidara threatened. Madara still continued his scrutiny of the ground. "Madara, you don't get it, do you? I don't need to hear you need me. I could care less. I want to know you want to know how I feel. Can I know that?" Madara looked up. Why did things have to be so complicated?

"Deidara, why don't you tell me what you want," Madara suggested. Deidara sighed.

"You didn't come up with that on your own, did you?"

"But I went along with it, didn't I?"

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"It means that, once the concept was introduced to me, I didn't reject it," Madara sighed in exasperation. "Deidara, what I'm trying to say is, if only I could come up with it on my own, I would vocalize my thoughts," Deidara blinked. What was Madara trying to say?

"Would it make you happy if I gave you the time to learn?" Deidara asked slowly. Madara nodded, still not looking up. "Madara, did anyone ever tell you to play nice with the other kids?" Deidara asked mockingly. Madara shook his head. Deidara chuckled, stepping closer to Madara and leaning his head on the taller man's shoulder. "Me neither,"

"Seems we have a lot in common," Madara muttered, tentatively placing his hands high on Deidara's waist. Deidara smiled to himself.

"Do you see yourself particularly vulnerable?"

"Breath a word of this to anyone else and I will kill you," Madara replied, placing his hand on Deidara's lower back. 'How on earth did he slip past my guard? When did he get my faith?' Deidara wondered as he didn't pull away from Madara's touch. Madara sensed no hesitation from Deidara, and slowly let his hands slide down to cup Deidara's ass, squeezing lightly. Deidara let his forehead fall onto Madara's chest, grasping his shoulders tightly. Growling, Madara clashed their mouths together, tongues battling, lips mashing, teeth nipping. With a wet, popping sound their mouths parted, and Madara's descended on Deidara's neck while Deidara's emitted the most delicious sounds. Madara left a very satisfying, red hickey, and was about to mark Deidara again, when a disturbance caught their attention and made them stop.

"What was that?" breathed Deidara. They slunk towards the sources of the noises, Madara keeping a hand on Deidara's shoulder. Peeking through the foliage, they saw a silver haired figure bending over a pile of sticks. As they watched, he stood and they caught a glimpse of his face. Deidara gasped angrily. "That's him!" he whispered. "That's-" Madara sensed what was coming next, and grabbed Deidara around the waist before the artist could leap into action.

"Calm down," Madara whispered hoarsely. "Calm down! Get a hold of yourself!"

"That's him!" wailed Deidara. "He's the one who raped me! I swear-" Deidara grabbed Madara's arm in a vice like grip. "Believe me," he whispered. "I killed every single one of those men, except one. I got a picture of him as he ran off, and I swear, that is him, right there," Madara saw the desperation in Deidara's eyes, and glanced over his shoulder at the man. And then suddenly, something very, very strange happened.

As soon as Madara's grip loosened, Deidara wrenched free and ran at the man. In an instant, two things happened. The first, was that the man turned and made to protect himself, the second was that, Tobi got there first.

* * *

Kakashi didn't exactly know what had just happened, but he was able to deduce from the lack of pain and a person between him and his blond attacker he had been saved from the person attacking him. "T-Tobi?" Deidara asked, eye wide. Kakashi was about ready to ask the same question. "Tobi, what the hell are you doing?" Deidara demanded.

"Sempai, I can't let you hurt him," Tobi said, voice quivering.

"And why not, yeah?" Deidara challenged.

"I- I don't know," Tobi gasped. "I just-" Tobi glanced back at Kakashi, and Kakashi suddenly decided that fate was a total bitch.

"Obito?" he asked. Tobi blinked.

"I'm Tobi," Tobi said. Kakashi shook his head.

"No, you're Obito," he said.

/I have a headache from all of this! Just let Deidara beat the shit out of this guy!/

'I can't do that.'

/Why the hell not?/

'I- I don't know. I just feel- this man-'

/Tobi, aren't we supposed to be helping Deidara? Do you want to kill him?/

'I can't-' Tobi turned his back to Deidara, looking into Kakashi's eye.

" Who are you?"

"Kakashi, Hatake Kakashi, don't you know me? You have to know me!" Tobi shook his head.

"That's not familiar," Tobi said slowly. "I've never heard it before, but. . ." Tobi shook his head. "I'm sure I've never heard it in the sense it reminds me of, but you. . ."

"The fucker cut off my arm!" Deidara shrieked. "You bastard, how can you live?" Deidara attempted to push past Tobi, but Tobi pushed him roughly to the side.

/You bastard. If I could take over I would./ Madara growled. /Get him up and kill that Kakashi bastard!/ Tobi returned to find Deidara struggling to his feet, looking pissed off. Tobi gulped.

"Deidara-" Tobi started, but Deidara gave him a silencing look.

"Shut it, Tobi," Deidara snapped. He then turned his withering glare to Kakashi. "You," he glared. "You-"

"Deidara, just- please, stay quiet for a moment!" Deidara glared at Tobi.

"Why should I, un?" he demanded.

"Because I think he knows who I was," Tobi said. Kakashi thought this time might be opportune moment to sneak off, but Deidara was a little more observant than he had first guessed, and was soon on top of him, pinning him to the ground. Growling, Deidara clubbed Kakashi over the head with his fists, and for Kakashi, everything went black.

* * *

Deidara poked at the fire, sending a glare that made the fire look icy in Tobi's direction. "Why, exactly, did you stop me from taking my revenge?" he asked curtly. Tobi sighed.

"Deidara, I- I feel as if I know him, and-"

'I love him.' Tobi suddenly realized.

/WHAT THE HELL?!/

'It's not my fault! It's whoever I was!'

"Tobi!" Deidara yelled. "Don't ignore me! Just tell me why the fuck you won't let me kill him!" Tobi sighed.

"Please calm down, Sempai. Please?" Tobi couldn't help it, with his last plea he felt the dams break and the tears flow down his face. Deidara sighed in frustration.

"You don't care enough about me, un?" he asked. "You'd rather not have human life ended no matter what he did, hmm?"

"Deidara, please! Just listen to me!" Deidara took deep breaths, attempting to remain calm.

"Right, Tobi. Why don't you want to kill him?"

"I think I might know him," Tobi said. "I- I feel a certain way about him, even though I've never seen him," Deidara sighed.

"So talk to him," Deidara said moodily. "When he wakes up, talk to him, un,"

"Sempai? Are you all right?" Deidara nodded.

"Yah, un. I'd like to hear what he has to say for himself," Deidara looked off to the side awkwardly. "And, I mean, if you want to. . ." Tobi gulped.

"If it's all right with you Sempai," he said. Then, Kakashi groaned and opened his eyes. They both looked over, then exchanged a glance. This was it.

* * *

A/N: REVIEW PLEASE!


	15. He'd Never Return That Call

A/N: I'm so glad no one reads the reviews of this story. Disclaimer: I do not own these characters. Nikki-chan is a bad person.

* * *

Kakashi awoke and groaned, finding himself with a headache but otherwise unharmed. In only a few seconds he saw Obito bend over him. "Obito?" he asked.

"I told you, I'm Tobi," Tobi said.

"Fine, Tobi. I swear, though, you look exactly like someone I used to know,"

"Uh, yeah, um, I was actually going to talk to you about that. See, you seem to think you know me, and I- um, well, I- I can't remember who I am," Tobi explained haltingly, feeling his face heat up at being so close to this man.

"Oh?"

"Yeah, I um- well, I don't know who I am, and-"

"You said that,"

"So do you know who I am?" Tobi blurted.

"I think," Kakashi sat up, rubbing his head. "You look exactly like my friend, except older. I swear it. Except I thought he was dead. You look exactly like him," Kakashi casually reached out and touched Tobi's cheek. Tobi jumped, and blushed.

"A friend? Are you sure?" Tobi asked, wondering what these feelings meant.

"Well, we did have our differences and didn't exactly see eye to eye all the time, but we were friends,"

"Oh," Tobi looked at the ground awkwardly. "Who was I?" he finally asked. Kakashi laughed softly.

"I think you might have been Uchiha Obito," he replied. Tobi gulped. 'An Uchiha. Sempai doesn't like-'

/Shut it, Tobi. Get this little chat over with and then apologize to Deidara./

'For what?'

/For all the mean things you did, dip shit./ Tobi didn't inquire further.

"What was I like?" Tobi asked.

"You were pretty lax about rules," Kakashi said, chuckling to himself. "And you were always late,"

"Really?" Tobi couldn't help but smile. "What happened to my eye?"

"Your eye?" Kakashi looked up, and saw that indeed, Tobi was missing his left eye. Kakashi touched his own face. "You gave it to me," he whispered. "When- when you were crushed, you gave me your Sharingan,"

/Satisfied yet? Deidara's probably off crying somewhere-/

'Not yet. Just a bit longer.' Tobi argued.

"Was I a good person?"

"The best," Kakashi sighed. "You showed me so many things, Obito. I've longed for a chance to see you again, just once. You changed my whole life. Why don't you come back to Konoha with me?" Tobi shook his head, feeling torn.

"I would love to go to Konoha," he said. "Believe me, I would like nothing more than to stay with you but. . ." Tobi coughed. "You don't need me, you just want me,"

"What?"

"There's someone who needs me. I can't abandon him now," Tobi looked at his lap.

"He can come- wait, you don't mean. . ." Tobi nodded.

"I'm Akatsuki. And- I- I have a lover,"

"You're kidding! I know you didn't like rules, but that much?"

"I- it- Kakashi-"

"How do you know my name?" Kakashi demanded.

"I-" Tobi gulped, also confused. "It just came to me. . ."

"That's it, I swear you're him. You have to come back to Konoha,"

"I can't go back," Tobi said softly. "Whatever happened before, that's exactly when it happened: before. What's happening now, is happening now. Kakashi, I can't go back. I have to stay with Sempai,"

"So who is this lover of yours, anyway?" Kakashi demanded. "Why is he so much more important?"

"My lover happens to be someone you raped," Tobi said, wondering why he didn't spit venom.

"Huh?"

"You know, blond, thin, about so tall," Tobi gestured vaguely. "A mechanical eye, likes to blow shit up,"

"Oh, um. . ." Kakashi coughed. "I- I was drunk, and-"

"You also cut off his arm,"

"That was the same person?" Kakashi asked. Tobi nodded. "Damn,"

"I can understand the arm thing, but why rape him?"

"Obito-"

"Tobi,"

"All right, Tobi. But don't you see, he's murdered people! Tobi, he's a bad person!" Kakashi cried. Tobi shook his head.

"He has his reasons. It's not like he wanted to join Akatsuki," Tobi's defense sounded feeble, even to himself.

"Obito, please, just come home! I won't tell anyone about you being Akatsuki-"

"I can't,"

"Why do you have to stay with this Deidara person anyway? Ditch him, and we can leave for Konoha straight away,"

/You're not interested, Tobi. And what the hell are you pulling, anyway? Why can't I take over?/

'I don't know, Madara. Now shut up, I need to think about this.'

/No you don't! You're not interested!/

'Madara, what is your problem? He's only telling the truth-'

/Tobi! You can't leave Deidara alone! Just leave Kakashi and go find Deidara!/ Tobi sighed and looked around, noticing for the first time Deidara wasn't here. Had Madara said something about that already?

"Kakashi, the fact is that, despite my feelings towards you, I also have obligations to-"

"You don't sound like you really want to," Kakashi pointed out. "Since when did you care about obligations?"

"You've got to be worse than trash, though, to abandon your friends," Tobi said, attempting to sound resolute about his decision. Kakashi was just as unconvinced as he was.

"But you're abandoning me by staying here," Kakashi said.

"You still haven't justified yourself about raping Deidara,"

"You're just trying to get out of answering my question. If I answer yours, you promise to give me your honest answer about coming home?"

"I promise," sighed Tobi, resigning himself to going back to Konoha.

"All right. It was at night, in the middle of a forest. You can understand how out of touch we were feeling, right?"

"We? You mean-"

"Yeah, I was with five other people. Well, anyway, we were all piss drunk. I was so drunk, in fact, I didn't have my mask or forehead protector on. So, I guess, Deidara didn't recognize me in our later battle. Ahem. As I was saying, we were all really, really drunk, and miles away from anywhere. So, of course, when Asuma got horny, we all sort of just jumped him. You understand how sexy he looks, right? And how much like a girl? If you were in my position, you would've done the same,"

"You justify yourself by being drunk?"

"I sure do. Wouldn't you?"

"You're sick. How could you treat another human being like that?"

"Because he's treated human beings worse,"

/Tobi-/

'Shut it, Madara!'

/Tobi! Y-/

'I don't want to hear it!'

"No, Kakashi, you're wrong. Killing is merciful and artistic compared to rape. Rape destroys the mind and soul, and kills a person slowly from the inside out. Rape is far, far worse than a million murders," Tobi glared daggers at Kakashi. "I won't go back to Konoha, and in exchange for not hurting you, don't tell Konoha about me and Deidara's whereabouts, got it?" Tobi stood, towering over Kakashi. Kakashi stood as well.

"He's a villain, Obito," Kakashi sighed.

"My name is Tobi," Tobi growled, and this time, he meant it. "Deidara is not the villain here, you are. Deidara is just the victim, no matter what he's done in the past. What you did to him is unforgivable," Kakashi stood as well, glaring at Tobi.

"You know he's a bad person, deep down. I'll leave, and I won't tell anyone about you," Kakashi sighed. "but only because you willingly gave your life for mine," Kakashi looked around. "Don't expect someone like Deidara to stay faithful, either. Someone like him has no morals,"

"I'm sick of your bullshit. Get out of here, now," Kakashi sighed, turning.

"I wish this could've gone differently. Don't expect this to be our last encounter," he said, as he trudged off into the forest. Tobi sighed, leaning against a tree.

/TOBI!/ Madara screeched. /Where the fuck is Deidara?!/

'Huh?'

/Where is he? Do you know? No! Go find him, you bastard!/ Tobi jumped up, whirling around. Deidara wasn't there. Wait- this was familiar. What had happened when he first noticed? What had he done?

* * *

Deidara sighed, looking down into the clear water of the stream. 'When did this happen?' he wondered to himself. 'Tobi just seemed to slip into my faith, I didn't even know. And now look, he let me fall.' Deidara ran his fingers through the frigid water. 'I wonder how long it's going to take him? An hour? They're probably gone, long gone. Probably by tonight they'll be fucking like rabbits.' Deidara removed his numb fingers from the creek. 'If I called out to him right now, he'd never hear it. He'll never return.' Deidara twirled a leaf between his fingers. 'At least two long lost lovers were reunited.' he sighed aloud. "You're such an idiot, Deidara," he whispered. "Madara actually liking you? You wish. Tobi? It couldn't last. I'm too much of a bitch for him to stick around for long, yeah," Deidara looked over his shoulder. No one. "And he's not coming." Deidara turned back to watch the creek, trying to see a reflection in the water. 'I could always follow them. I do have that one attack. . .it would end everything so perfectly, so artistically. . .' Deidara caught a glimpse of black in the water, and looked over his shoulder into the eye of Madara. "Ma-" he started, but Madara placed a gloved finger over his mouth.

"Not a word," he whispered. "I'm sorry I couldn't get here sooner," Deidara blinked his eye slowly. After a moment of silence, Madara removed his hand and pressed their mouths together in a clean, sweet, apologetic kiss. Somewhere in that kiss was Tobi, though he wasn't conscious of it. Madara let his hand run through Deidara's hair, pressing their mouths further together, his sinful tongue slipping past Deidara's willing lips. Deidara moaned as Madara slipped his hand up his shirt, pinching lightly at his right nipple. Gasping, they broke apart and Deidara saw Tobi.

"Tobi?"

"Yes, Sempai," he said sheepishly. "I- I'm sorry, I just- I wanted so badly to know who I was. And- I had all these strange feelings for Kakashi and-"

"I don't want to hear your excuses," Deidara snapped. Tobi bit his lip.

"I didn't want to feel that way," he said. "and- I'm a selfish person. Can I make it up to you?"

"What do you mean, un?"

"I mean, doing something completely selfless? Can I?" Deidara blinked, utterly confused. Tobi glanced down meaningfully.

"Oh," Deidara said, blushing.

"I know this isn't really the place to pamper you, but I promise once we get to a town we'll get a room and. . ." Tobi trailed off. "Um, I mean, I'll wait on you-"

"Tobi, um, I'm fine," Deidara said awkwardly. "I- I took another picture. It- it overrode the one of-"

"Of the men who raped you?" Deidara's eyes widened in shock at Tobi's words.

"What?! If I was going to get raped, do you think I'd leave my eye on?" he cried.

"Uh-"

"Of course not! Why the hell would I want their pictures in my brain? The pictures were of Sasori," Tobi gaped.

"All this time it was just pictures of your ex-lover?!" Madara screeched. Deidara blinked.

"Uh, Madara?"

"What the fuck?! Here I was worried about you because of all that shit about those pictures and-"

"I'll make it up, all right?" Deidara cried. "I- I'm sorry, it's just-" Deidara broke off as Madara sent him an angry look. Madara sighed.

"I'm only angry because I was wo- um. . .wanted to screw you. I'll let you and Tobi continue," Madara retreated and Tobi reappeared.

"What happened?" he asked worriedly.

"Nothing, Madara was just worried,"

"So the pictures weren't of the men who raped you?"

"No, but- but when I felt your hands on me, and I saw him, I felt those- it's complicated. I couldn't see you, all I could see was his face, his sneer, and I could see clearly his intentions. I was scared, and I only did what I should've," Deidara explained. Tobi exhaled.

"I'm just glad you're all right," he said, caressing Deidara's face. Deidara hummed, leaning into Tobi's touch. Tobi let his other hand roam under Deidara's shirt, after removing the glove, and pinched lightly at Deidara's nipple. Deidara moaned as he felt Tobi push him back. Tobi broke their kiss and put his mouth next to Deidara's ear. "Can I?" he asked. "Do I have permission to-"

"Yes!" groaned Deidara, arching his hips into Tobi's. Tobi moaned, but regained his composure and pulled off his other glove. Carefully, he unbuttoned and unzipped Deidara's pants, sliding them down around the artist's knees. He then tentatively slid Deidara's boxers down as well, releasing his arousal. Deidara whimpered at the cold air on his heated flesh, and also at the lustful look Tobi was giving him. Tobi had never seen anyone else asides from himself, and to say the least he was slightly surprised. A slightly frustrated groan on Deidara's part grasped Tobi's attention, and Tobi remembered his goal. Without any further hesitation, and with a bit of instruction from Madara, Tobi took the tip of Deidara's arousal in his mouth, rubbing his tongue over the slit. Deidara moaned and arched his hips up. Tobi held Deidara's hips down from there on. Also another decision was to humor Deidara, and he slid his mouth almost to the base in one fluid motion. The delicious sounds leaking from Deidara's mouth coaxed Tobi to suck harder, running his tongue over all that he could, bobbing his head up and down. Deidara moaned, louder this time. Tobi sensed he was close, and rammed the tip to the back of his throat, swallowing around it. With a final cry, Deidara came in Tobi's mouth. Panting, Tobi sat up, licking his lips. Deidara looked up at him, and suddenly their mouths were crashing together, tongues mingling, Deidara tasting his own seed in Tobi's mouth. After a moment of kissing Tobi pulled back and nuzzled his cheek against Deidara's. Deidara sighed and slithered out from under Tobi, pulling up his boxers and pants.

"Do you want to camp here tonight, Sempai?"

"Sure, why not," Deidara replied. Sure, Tobi was going to have some answering to do, but that could wait. After all, there weren't many people selfless to sacrifice their own pleasure for the sake of their partner's.

* * *

A/N: There, I gave you a little teasing, and a giant chapter. So review please! (and yes, isn't it obvious that Kakashi somehow comes back?)


	16. A Night of Love

A/N: Holy Madara in a menorah, I got so many lovely reviews! I love your input!

* * *

'Madara, um. . .maybe, if you could, um. . . That is, when we get to the hotel. . .'

/I'll stay out of your way. But be sure to inform him I'll have my fun later./

'You mean you both will have fun later.' Tobi corrected.

/Sure. But Tobi, you don't have a memory!/

'I don't like that sarcasm. What are you going to do?'

/Well, do you know what to do?/

'What?'

/I mean, that blowjob was pretty impromptu. . ./

'What are you hinting at?'

/I could just give you a few pointers, if need be./

'What? Oh, um. . .'

"Tobi, you're blushing, un," Deidara said nonchalantly.

"Um. . .I'm just talking to Madara,"

"Oh? Now I'm getting ideas, un," Deidara said, grinning, but allowing Tobi to go back to his conversation.

'Fine.' Tobi consented. 'But just as long as Deidara doesn't know. I'd hate to screw it up.'

/Good boy, Tobi./ Tobi growled but said nothing. This was going to be a wonderful moment between him and Deidara, and Tobi didn't want to ruin it with his inexperience.

* * *

Tobi was nervous. This was Deidara he was dealing with, and if it wasn't being too inexperienced he was worrying about it was over doing it. And then there was always the fear Madara would take over, out of lust, and do some serious damage. But, he tried to assure himself, everything was fine. , and everything would be romantic and beautiful.

But once the door was locked, and Deidara gave Tobi that sexy look, all reason and worry vanished.

/If you can't tell, that look in his eye means he wants you./ Madara said.

'Madara,' Tobi whined. 'I can tell!'

/Just being helpful./ Madara replied cheerily.

'You voyeur.'

/My, what a vocabulary! Do you also know what the word dominatrix means?/

'What?' Madara chuckled. 'I'm not a pervert!'

/Right, right. Just go screw him, he's beginning to look frustrated./ Tobi snapped back to the real world to find Deidara waiting patiently.

"What did Madara have to say, un?" he asked softly.

"Nothing important," Tobi replied. Deidara nodded, but didn't look back up, opting instead to stare at the floor. Tobi cupped Deidara's cheek, turning his face up. "Sempai?" Tobi asked. "We don't have to, I-"

"I want to," Deidara said forcefully. "It's just- you only get one first time. . ."

"So you want to take it slow?" Tobi asked. Deidara blushed and attempted not to make eye contact.

"Yah, un," he said awkwardly.

"Of course, Sempai. Whatever you want," Tobi said, relieved Deidara had been thinking the same thing he had. You only get one first time.

Deidara hesitated only a moment, before pushing his hands past Tobi's cloak, splaying his fingers against the hard chest muscles. Tobi guided Deidara over to the bed, sitting him down. "Let me do all the work, Sempai," he said, trying so hard not to stumble over the words. "To make up for, um. . ." Deidara nodded slowly. That did sound appealing, not having to do anything. And it was so like Tobi to want to pamper Deidara. So the artist sat back, letting Tobi do all the work.

Tobi kissed Deidara with fiery passion, letting his hands trail up and down the artist's sides. Deidara gave a breath moan at the light, gentle touches he was receiving. Tobi delved just the very tips of his fingers below the hem of Deidara's shirt, sliding them softly over Deidara's tan skin. Tobi broke their kiss, and looked into Deidara's eyes, their breath mingling in the small space between their faces. Tobi then began to slide Deidara's cloak off his shoulders. Deidara stiffened slightly, but after a moment he helped and the cloak was shed. Without much more thought, Tobi divested Deidara of his fishnet and shirt as well. Tobi then gazed, for the first time, upon a half naked Deidara.

Tobi was surprised, to say the least. He had never even given much thought to how Deidara's arms had been reattached. Neither had he thought of what other mouths Deidara might possess. As if without his consent, his hand reached out and brushed the stitching that held Deidara's chest mouth together. Deidara blushed and looked away, covering it with his hands. Tobi understood, and this time let his fingers draw across the shriveled skin of Deidara's right arm. Deidara tried to cover this as well. "It's all right, Sempai," Tobi assured him. Deidara sighed. Only two people had ever seen his shriveled arm. The first was, naturally, Kakuzu, who was very moody about his handiwork. The second was Hidan, who had just happened to be there. Deidara knew Hidan's opinion didn't matter, but the 'Ooh, our blond little whore won't be able to look at himself, he's so ugly!' did sort of hit a nerve. Since then he had covered himself up.

/What the hell is that?/ Madara asked, shock and slight disgust evident in his voice.

'Deidara-sempai lost his arms, and Kakuzu had to reattach them somehow. You don't have a problem with it, right?'

/A problem? Of course I have a problem! I've learned that when the skin looks like that, something's wrong with the circulation. This Kakuzu didn't even do a half-assed job! Remind me to fix it. Oh, um, and it looks gross. Now continue, Deidara won't stay still too much longer./

Tobi rubbed his thumb over the shriveled skin again. True, it did look a bit pale. Maybe Madara was right. But, disregarding this fact for now, Tobi bent down to capture Deidara's lips in a passionate kiss. Deidara responded readily, their tongues rubbing and twisting together, teeth nipping at each other's lips. Tentatively, Deidara wound his arms around Tobi's neck, a shiver skipping down Tobi's spine as the shriveled skin met with his neck. He had somehow gotten it into his head now that the skin being like that was something of a wound, like a severe open sore would be. But Deidara noticed Tobi's discomfort and removed his arms, looking off to the side, a crimson blush spread across his cheeks. Tobi sighed, rubbing the back of his hand to Deidara's arms. "It's all right, Deidara. I'm not judging you," he said, not really noticing he forgot the honorific. But Deidara noticed. Feeling more secure he let his arms slither around Tobi's neck again.

Tobi kissed Deidara heatedly, trying to show the artist he wasn't repulsed. Deidara accepted this and kissed back with vigor. Tobi removed his mouth, moving it to Deidara's ear lobe. He desperately wanted to kiss ever inch of Deidara's gorgeous, tan skin. Deidara gasped ever to slightly at the strange sensation, but then again, going slow and being gentle, were both new, and he warmed to this new revelation gamely. With growing passion, Tobi moved to the other ear, then slowly slid his mouth down Deidara's neck to the base where his neck and shoulder connected. Biting softly, Tobi sucked and swirled his tongue around. Deidara moaned, arching his chest up into Tobi's still clothed body. Tobi allowed his hands to slide down to Deidara's waist, holding the artist's hips. He then trailed his mouth down Deidara's collar bone, gave the chest mouth a quick peck, then took Deidara's left nipple into his mouth. Deidara moaned loudly, pressing himself harder against Tobi. Tobi heatedly moved his mouth to Deidara's other nipple, giving it the same treatment. Then, with great care, he slowly licked and kissed his way down Deidara's slightly concave stomach, stopping at his tummy button to dip his tongue in. Deidara gasped loudly, jumping. You could put your tongue there?

Tobi finally reached Deidara's waistband, and made a small note of how the clothing hung off the artist's bony hips. Tobi then looked up, making eye contact with Deidara. Deidara gave a nod, letting his head loll to the side. Tobi, silently glad nothing marred Deidara's precious skin below the clothing still left, began to slowly slide Deidara's pants down. Deidara lifted his hips up off the bed, helping Tobi to shed the cloth. Gazing affectionately down at Deidara's newly exposed flesh, Tobi smiled, relieved that there were no other strange wounds or adaptations. Deidara squirmed awkwardly, and Tobi looked back at the artist's face. Deidara was blushing violently, looking quite uncomfortable. Tobi paled. "What's wrong, Deidara?" he asked worriedly, climbing back over Deidara to look him in the eye.

"N-nothing," Deidara replied, gulping. "Just- seems a bit unfair. . ." he gestured at his near naked body, and then at Tobi's fully clothed one.

"Ah," Tobi understood. It made things more equal and, more importantly, more mutual. While he was busy understanding Deidara, the artist slipped his hands inside Tobi's cloak and expertly flung it off Tobi's shoulders. Tobi tuned in when he felt Deidara's hand mouth licked his neck. Caught off guard, Tobi jumped slightly. Deidara instantly withdrew his hand. "It's all right, Sempai," Tobi said, gently guiding Deidara's hand back to where it had been. The mouth bit, almost of it's own accord, sending pleasurable shivers shooting down Tobi's spine. Letting his eyes slide closed, Tobi felt Deidara's other hand grab his own, quickly doing away with first one glove, and then another. Tobi soon found himself eye to eye with Deidara, lust burning off their skin. Suddenly, all this pent up frustration exploded between them and they attacked each other, mouths raging like a stormy sea. Deidara's leg wrapped around Tobi's waist, his arms around the back of Tobi's head, hips bucking up erratically into Tobi's, their erections clashing. Skin burnt against skin, their writing bodies caught up in a swirling, passionate vortex that only sexual climax could free them of.

Tobi's hands flitted to Deidara's waist, their mouths still locked in a raging battle. Slowly, he began to slide Deidara's boxers off, the artist gasping and lifting his hips and then lowering his legs to allow Tobi the easiest time of it. With a slurping sound their mouths parted, eyes meeting. Deidara's eyes half-lidded, he gave a slight not, leaning back. Tobi wasted no time in descending upon Deidara's prominent arousal, now freed from its cloth confines. And this was where his knowledge ended. Following Madara's instruction, Tobi teasingly took the tip into his mouth, swirling his tongue over the slit. Deidara moaned, and again, under Madara's orders, Tobi held the artist's hips, down, preventing gagging and bucking. Gradually, once Deidara's moans grew slightly frustrated, Tobi took more and more of his member into his mouth. Deidara moaned even louder as Tobi spread his creamy thighs, cupping the artist's testicles. Tobi, sensing that Deidara was close by the way he tossed his head from side to side, rammed the tip of Deidara's erection to the back of his throat, swallowing around it. Deidara whimpered. "T-Tobi," he breathed. "I- I'm close-" Tobi bobbed his head up and down harder, wanting Deidara to come for him. With one final cry, Deidara spilled his seed into Tobi's mouth. Tobi swallowed it greedily, licking his lips as he looked back up at Deidara.

Deidara was breathing heavily. Tobi smiled, content to gaze at the artist while they both caught their breath. Finally Tobi met his gaze and leaned forward, mashing their mouths together. Deftly, Deidara's hands slipped under Tobi's shirt, slipping it up and over his head. Tobi gasped as Deidara's hand mouths licked around his nipples. Deidara leaned up and kissed Tobi on the lips, as his hands slid lower, to the hem of Tobi's pants. Tobi shivered as Deidara's hands slithered into pants. Groaning, Tobi let his head fall to press their foreheads together, their breathing harsh. It only took Deidara a minute to shed Tobi of his remaining clothing. And then he stopped, gulped, and met Tobi's lustful gaze with his own impassioned look. Cautiously, Deidara leaned back, allowing Tobi to move between his legs once more. "Sempai?" Tobi asked.

"Hmm?"

"Do we have any lubricant?"

"I- I don't know,"

'So what am I supposed to use?'

/Stick your fingers in his mouth, he'll understand./ Tobi, a bit awkwardly, pressed three fingers against Deidara's lips. Without hesitation Deidara took them past his lips and began massaging them with his tongue. Tobi was slightly shocked at the pleasure running through his veins at the simple actions Deidara performed with his mouth. His erection gave a painful twitch, and Deidara glanced down, momentarily stopping as he stared at Tobi's massive erection. Shaking it off, though, he continued sucking on Tobi's fingers.

'How much will this hurt Sempai?'

/Oh, that depends./

'On what?'

/Well, first off how well you prepare him and secondly, how big your dick is./

'Will I hurt Sempai a lot?'

/Hurt Deidara? Please, he's quite experienced. No worries about hurting him as long as you prepare properly./

Tobi was brought back to reality when Deidara stopped sucking on his fingers. The artist was breathing heavily, eye half lidded, cheeks flushed. Tobi sighed at how amazingly gorgeous his Sempai was. He carefully took his fingers and, after spreading Deidara's legs, inserted a single digit into Deidara's tight entrance. Deidara hissed slightly, and tensed only for a second before relaxing. Tobi circled his finger a few times before adding a second one. He gently spread his two fingers apart, gradually stretching Deidara's ring. Deidara gasped and moaned, arching his hips. After feeling Deidara was ready, Tobi added his third finger, spreading all three in different directions. Deidara squirmed and groaned, and then cried out, bucking his hips violently.

/You hit his prostate. Remember where that is./ Madara advised.

Tobi pressed his fingers to the same spot, sending Deidara into a moaning frenzy. Deidara's fists closed around the sheets, breathing hard as Tobi grew less gentle in his preparations. Eventually, he removed his fingers, feeling Deidara was prepared enough. Quickly he spat into his palm, and after applying the liquid to his own aching member he slowly eased the tip in. Deidara hissed, grabbing onto Tobi's shoulders. Tobi paused, his shaft only about two centimeters in. Deidara's breathing slowed. "All the way," he gasped.

/He means-/

'I understood him!'

Trying to be merciful about it, Tobi pushed the rest of the way in. Deidara gave a strangled cry, and Tobi waited patiently for the artist to adjust to having his wide girth buried inside him. It didn't take as long as Tobi had expected, and soon Deidara was panting in Tobi's ear. "Move." Tobi did as his sempai bid and pulled out halfway, slowly sliding back in. Making sure Deidara adjusted, Tobi pulled out a little more and slid in a little faster. Deidara moaned loudly, wrapping his legs around Tobi's waist.

/Pick up the pace, a little. Didn't he sound slightly frustrated?/

'What? I don't want to hurt Sempai. . .'

/Tobi. . .it's supposed to hurt! Deidara knows this, I wish I could get him to agree! Pound the shit out of him!/

'Who's frustrated now?'

/Just give him what he wants, baka./ Tobi followed Madara's advice, sliding all the way out and ramming back in. Deidara cried out and bucked his hips uncontrollably.

/Told you./

'Shut up.' Tobi snapped. Next time he pulled out, Deidara bucked up violently, groaning. The next time, Tobi managed to pound into Deidara's prostate, sending Deidara moaning and tossing his head.

It wasn't long before Tobi lost all control, pounding senselessly, managing to miraculously hit Deidara's prostate every time. But Tobi did notice when Deidara's hand snaked down to pleasure himself. Taking this as a sign he wasn't doing enough, Tobi removed Deidara's fingers from his manhood and replaced them with his own. Deidara was then reduced to moaning uncontrollably, one hand on Tobi's shoulder, the other fisting the blankets.

The fire in Tobi's lower stomach tightened, and he knew he was close. All he could do was hope he managed to send Deidara over the edge at either the same time or after himself. Luckily, Deidara gave one final cry, spilling his seed between them. His walls tightened around Tobi's member, causing Tobi to come only seconds later.

Tobi came down from his pleasure induced high to find Deidara breathing hard in his arms. Gulping, Deidara looked into Tobi's eye, giving a weak smile. "You're forgiven, un," he whispered. Tobi grinned, nuzzling his nose into Deidara's neck.

"Thank you, Sempai," he whispered back. And there, together, they drifted off into the best sleep of their lives.

* * *

A/N: Well, black55widow, enough foreplay? Final word count on the actual lemon: 2,210. I deserve a gold star.


	17. More of a Detour

A/N: Thank you to all my reviewers! I hope you liked the lemon, it was a bit prudish for my tastes, but whatever.

* * *

Tobi awoke, yawned, stretched, rolled over, and nearly screamed. Mornings would ever have the curse of temporary memory loss. At least, it seemed that way to Tobi. Once he remembered what happened, he was glad he didn't scream. Sighing, he allowed his memory to play back as he got out of bed. Quickly he located his clothes and slipped into the bathroom. Still in his happy little bubble, he started the shower and stepped in without thought. Yelping, he leapt back out. After a few seconds of waiting, Tobi judged the water to be warm enough and stepped back in.

/Good morning!/

"YAH!' Tobi screamed, jumping about a foot in the air.

'You scared me!' he said accusingly. Madara chuckled.

/I never would've guessed. Forget I was here?/

'Yeah.' Tobi admitted.

/That was a nice performance you put on last night. I'm sure Deidara is going to be glad he has a picture of your dick burned into his eye./

'What?'

/You didn't notice when his eye took that picture?/

'Uh. . .' Madara let out a barking laugh.

/I find myself appreciating my choice of host more and more every day./

'Can we not discuss this first thing in the morning?' Tobi asked, gritting his teeth.

/Whatever you want. I only wish you would be able to witness what I'm going to do to Deidara./ Tobi stiffened, hand halfway to the free shampoo.

'What?' he asked.

/You heard me. I've been more than generous with letting you and Deidara have your time. I think it's about time I roughed Deidara up a bit./

'But- but you'll be careful-'

/Oh please, a great man like me? I'll do what I like, and Deidara will just have to deal./

'I can't let that happen. Sempai is still-'

/Tobi, in about five minutes I'm going to take over, walk back into that room, and take Deidara. And there's nothing you can do about it./

'No!' screamed Tobi in his mind, looking around frantically, wishing there were some way he could keep Madara from taking over. Rushing out of the shower, he looked around the small bathroom. There had to be some way for him to keep Madara from getting to Deidara.

/Time's up./ Madara said menacingly after five minutes. Tobi screwed his eyes shut and willed with all his mind and heart for Madara to stay put. After a moment of nothing, Tobi cracked an eye open.

'What's going on?' he asked. Madara sighed.

/Don't worry, I'm not going to lay a finger on Deidara that I know he wouldn't want./

'Then what the hell did you give me a heart attack for?!'

/Hey, calm down! I was just testing!/

'Testing? Testing what?'

/Testing why I couldn't take over before!/ Madara replied. /I swear, it would've saved us so much time./

'Oh. So you couldn't take over?'

/That's right./

* * *

Deidara awoke, wished he hadn't, got angry he couldn't go back to sleep, and finally opened his eyes. Looking to his right, he noticed Tobi wasn't there. Then Deidara realized the shower was on. This didn't improve his mood. First he had to wake up, second he couldn't go back to sleep, third Tobi wasn't there, and finally, he couldn't get in the shower. Rolling over, Deidara allowed himself a small smile.

As Deidara listened to the sound of the running water from Tobi's shower, some strange sounds accompanied it. Was Tobi trying to wreck the room before they left? The sounds grew more frantic, and then as suddenly as they had begun, they stopped. Thoroughly confused, Deidara got up and, after slipping into his boxers and pants, knocked on the bathroom door. "Yeah Sempai?" Tobi answered, not opening the door.

"You all right?" Deidara asked casually.

"Yes, Sempai. I'll be out in a few minutes, if you want the shower."

"Take your time, un, I'm not in a hurry."

"Ok, Sempai," Tobi replied cheerfully. Deciding it was a Tobi thing, Deidara went back to the bed. Sighing, he lay back down. Why had he gotten up in the first place when it felt so nice just to lie here.

* * *

'So what exactly does this mean?'

/It means there's something amazingly screwed up going on./ Madara huffed. /You feel strongly about Deidara, right?/

'Well duh!'

/Right, then. You were able to also stop me from taking over when Kakashi was around. You felt strongly about him, too, right?/ Tobi looked at the wall, ashamedly.

'Yes.'

/Right. When called upon, you must have some sort of subconscious reserves of strength./

'That's absurd. How could I have some sort of power I'm not aware of?'

/Obviously I screwed something up and you tapped into my power. There's no way someone else, random, practically dying, would be able to-/

'I'm able to fight!'

/Right./ Madara drawled. /And when have you fought by yourself? And besides, even if you were even if you had the slightest ability, you wouldn't be able to overpower mine. There's just no way./

'So you're saying that I used your own power against you?'

/It must have to do with sharing a body. When I found you, you must've had some sort of ninja training, and somehow our chakra was able to merge or something. Here, try something./ Tobi attempted a small chakra exercise, as Madara instructed. Nothing happened. /All right. Only under certain circumstances can you tap into it. We'll just have to find out what those circumstances are./

'This is so confusing. Can't I just finish my shower?'

/Fine, fine. I'll just contemplate this little dilemma on my own./

'You do that.'

* * *

Tobi stepped out of the bathroom, shitless, toweling off his hair. "Your turn, Sempai," he said. Deidara groaned and opened his eye.

"Huh? Oh, right. I must've drifted off," he said, sliding off the bed and standing up. As they passed each other, their shoulders brushed. Tobi was reminded, again, of the state of Deidara's arm. Deidara didn't seem to notice, and quickly stepped into the bathroom, closing the door behind him. Tobi sank to the bed, laying back.

'Well?' he asked. 'What conclusions did you come to?'

/I've come to the conclusion to never let you see Deidara or anyone else you love-/ Tobi looked at the wall in humiliation. /-in trouble./ Madara finished. Tobi blinked confusedly. Then he smiled.

'Right. Good idea. With your power, it would be easy to protect Deidara. I probably won't ever have to see him in danger or even remote discomfort.'

/Exactly, I- hey. . ./

'What is it, Madara?' Tobi asked innocently, grinning.

/Nothing. But, um, since I've already lost face during this conversation, I'm going to go all the way and ask you for advice./ Tobi sat up.

'Advice? On what?' Tobi asked, ready to assist. He really was too nice.

/Um, well, it's about Deidara./

'Oh? What about him?'

/You don't think he hate's me, do you?/

'What? Of course not!' Tobi cried in his head. 'In fact, I was wondering myself if he liked you more than me.'

/No you weren't./

'Not officially, Madara. It was just sort of a question I asked myself, one you didn't listen in on. But the thing is, Deidara's a killer. He obviously would like someone who could be like him. I don't want to seem too nice, or good, or something. You don't have to worry about that.'

/So you definitely think he likes me?/

'Yes, but Madara, liking isn't the same as forgiving. Deidara might still be mad at you, but if he's still mad it's only because he cares about you enough to care what you do. But he's probably not that mad, it takes a little more to get him riled up. But he can get mad at you, he doesn't get mad at me.'

/What are you talking about?/

'You'll see eventually.'

/Sure./ Madara sounded unconvinced. Tobi didn't argue.

* * *

Fifteen minutes later, Deidara emerged from the bathroom, hair dripping. Madara sat up, grinning maniacally. "Good morning, Madara," Deidara said, hoping that smile didn't mean anything that involved too much work. Madara said nothing, standing up and pressing Deidara against the wall, looming menacingly over him. Deidara looked lazily into his eye. Roughly, Madara grabbed Deidara's upper right arm.

"That's disgusting," he growled. Deidara narrowed his eye, slapping Madara's hand away.

"You got a problem, un?"

"Yes, I do,"

"No sex for you, if you're disgusted by me," Deidara snapped.

"I never said I was disgusted with you," Madara pointed out.

"So who are you disgusted with, hmm?" Deidara asked heatedly.

"I'm disgusted for whoever made such a mess out of simply reattaching an appendage," Madara said, grinning. Shock morphed Deidara's face, and almost without his consent his left hand fled to his right, rubbing over the shriveled skin.

"Kakuzu-"

"Oh yes, so that's his name?"

"Uh, yeah, but he does this all the time. He told me it was too dead to-"

"Such naivety. He just didn't want to expend the energy to reanimate it," Madara said firmly.

"Oh, and like you know how to do that?" Deidara demanded.

"You continually underestimate me, Dei-chan. Of course I can fix your arm," Madara, more gently this time, ran his fingers over Deidara's arm. "But it'll take some effort on your part. You might be pretty drained by the end of it."

"But you can fix it?" Deidara said, ignoring Madera's previous comment.

"Yes, but Deidara, you might be unconscious for a matter of days," Madara said slowly, emphasizing his point. Deidara nodded slowly. There was more behind that statement than merely being unconscious. It meant he would have to trust Madara and Tobi to watch over him.

"Sure, whatever, un," Deidara said casually. But they both understood what a big step towards trusting each other this was. They could practically read each other's minds.

* * *

Ok, review please! I like reviewers! Three reviews and I post the next chapter! (in case you can't tell, I'm taking a detour from the song to get my fabulous plot device over with. Yay!


	18. Second part of the Detour

A/N: Are you people alive? Please review and tell me you still like this story! And I'm just making shit up this chapter, ok? There's no excuse for it. Please don't hurt me.

* * *

"All right, just stay there," Madara instructed. Deidara sighed, doing as he was told. 'Typical, just typical.' he thought. 'He's going to make this huge deal over it, pretend it's taking all of his energy, and make it look like such a sacrifice and-' Deidara looked up as he saw Madara begin to climb a tree. Utterly confused, Deidara zoomed in with his eye to try to see Madara.

"What are you doing?" Deidara asked.

"I'm trying to find a fucking holly leaf. Just bear with me,"

"There's one to your right, un," Deidara said casually. Madara snatched the leaves and leapt down to the ground and walked back over to Deidara.

"You can sit down, or lie down, if you want," he said, slightly awkwardly. Deidara sat down, cross-legged.

"Mind telling me what the holly leaf is for?" Deidara asked.

"Holly happens to have no absorbing properties, and can be used excellently to transport liquids with very little contamination."

"Ah." Deidara and Madara looked at each other.

"Well go on then," Madara urged, looking as if his patience was running out. Deidara quickly took off his cloak and shirt, discarding them behind him. Madara sat down next to Deidara, running his fingers roughly over the dead skin. Deidara kept very, very still. "Lie down," Madara commanded, pushing Deidara roughly to the ground. Quickly, he started undoing the stitching that held Deidara's arm on. Deidara shivered, Madara wasn't known for tenderness or warm hands, but didn't make a sound. Soon the stitching was undone and Madara made a surprised noise. Deidara screwed his eye shut. He was tempted to ask what was wrong, but a sick feeling he had in his stomach told him he wouldn't like the answer. But Madara, without regard to such feelings in Deidara's gut, decided to dictate everything that he saw. "The bone hasn't grown back properly. Quite an issue we have here. You should see it, it's amazing you've had full control over your arms. And the flesh around it- my God, all he did was put a seal on here to keep the stench away. And you didn't notice? Half your arm is rotted flesh." Deidara kept his mouth shut. Kakuzu was such an ass. "Well, all we have to work with is this half-rotted arm, some twisted bone, and me. I'd say your chances are pretty good." Deidara looked at Madara with his mechanical eye. Good thing he knew Madara to be a blunt, brutally honest person.

With deft precision Madara sliced open his own arm. Deidara's real eye shot open wide, and again, without his consent, his eye took a picture. Deidara pondered, not for the first time, what it would be like to only have one eye. Pros being he didn't have to live with any old thing his eye decided to take a picture of plastered on his retina, the con being his depth perception and general sight would be cut in half. A fair fight.

Madara didn't look at Deidara as he quickly collected the blood in the holly leaf. He then bandaged his arm, making sure to stop the bleeding. Taking the blood, he quickly dipped the tips of each of his fingers in the blood, and pressed his hands to the dead flesh of Deidara's arm. As if to make Deidara's attempts at ignoring the situation more difficult, Madara decided to explain what the hell he was doing. "You see, the point is to sort of clone my blood, and reanimate the dead tissue using a very special technique. No one else would be able to perform this." Deidara decided to turn off his mechanical eye. No sense in accidentally getting a picture of his mutilated arm. After a half an hour of chakra control and blood, Madara sat back. "That should do it. Now comes he hard part." Deidara finally broke his silence.

"What do I have to do, hmm?" he asked.

"You? Just-" Madara sighed. "It's quite complicated. The whole point is to make sure your life force is put into the arm, so that I won't have control over it. Right now, you can't move it, can you?"

"No, un."

"And how much pain are you in?"

"None, yeah."

"That's all about to change. Once I perform this last seal, your chakra will be drained into your arm. Expect near absolute chakra depletion, and instant unconsciousness," Madara explained.

"If I'm expecting instant unconsciousness, un, then why tell me about it, yeah?"

"Because-" Madara sighed. "How the fuck am I going to get your chakra into an arm that only has mine?" Deidara blinked.

"Magic?" he asked hopefully.

"Don't be dumb, Deidara. You know perfectly well what I have to do."

"We're going to hell for this," Deidara stated.

"Like killing people and having homosexual intercourse won't send you? Look, it's not that bad," Madara tried to persuade.

"Why didn't you tell me about this before we started, un?" Deidara asked quietly.

"Because then you'd say no," Madara stated. "And this way it will be better than before, you'll have your arm back."

"But Madara-"

"Now you sound like a whiney child. All I need is your word, and I can fix all your problems. Just trust me, all right?" Deidara closed his eye, taking a few calming breathes.

"Fine," he said, gritting his teeth. "I give you full control." All the time, a single question was running through Deidara's mind: Why do you trust him?

Madara knew this was unholy and completely disgraceful. Deidara wasn't trusting by nature, and it was either his love of his arm or that. . .maybe. . .Madara was something more to him. Slowly, attempting gentleness, Madara performed the necessary seals to lock Deidara's chakra under his control. Roughly, he grasped Deidara's other hand. "Trust me," he whispered, performing the final hand motion. Deidara gave a cry, his eye shooting open before falling limp. Madara sighed and began the long work of reattaching the arm.

* * *

"Oh, hi Kakashi," Iruka said with a friendly smile. Kakashi grinned and pulled up a chair. Iruka set down his pen and leaned back in his chair, knowing he wouldn't get any work done with his friend there.

"How has your day been?" Kakashi asked.

"Oh, all right, the kids were actually somewhat well-behaved today," Iruka replied. "And you?"

"Nothing," Kakashi replied, smiling. Iruka rolled his eyes.

"As always," he said. They sat in companionable silence for a few minutes, before Kakashi cleared his throat.

"Iruka," he said slowly. "we've been friends for quite a while."

"Yes we have," Iruka agreed.

"And, I was just wondering if you, well, might want to go out with me on Saturday?" Kakashi rushed the last part. Iruka froze, staring at the Copy Ninja's pleading face. Slowly, he shook his head.

"Kakashi, you're nice and all, but if I'm going to date someone, they have to be able to take care of themselves."

"What?"

"Kakashi, you're always so uncommitted," Iruka said. "I really don't mind us being friends, but in a lover I want a more stable person. Please understand, I don't hate you-"

"Yeah, I understand," Kakashi growled, standing up. "I guess I've taken care of my business here, so I'll just be going." Dejectedly, Kakashi left the classroom. As he stepped into the sun, Shizune ran up to him.

"Kakashi-san!" she cried, breathing hard. "I'm so glad I found you! Tsunade wants to speak to you immediately!"

"All right," Kakashi sighed, following Shizune all the way to Tsunade's office. And there she left him, in the presence of a not very amused Hokage. "What did you want to talk to me about?" Kakashi asked, not really in the mood for getting yelled at.

"It's about Team 7," Tsunade said, rubbing her forehead. "Frankly, there are many more qualified ninjas out there willing to teach them. And now that Sasuke's gone, Sakura's my student, and Naruto's taken his training into his own hands, I don't find much reason for you to really stick around them. I'll be assigning you missions full time now, and ones that will take up more of your time, now that you're not much of a teacher." Kakashi sighed. First he gets rejected by the man he'd had a crush on for five months, and now he lost his job as a teacher.

"I understand," he said slowly. "but may I have a week of time off before my first mission? Just to take care of some personal matters. . ."

"Of course. But I expect you here, in my office in exactly one week, and in one piece. Got it?"

"Hai, Hokage-sama," Kakashi bowed and left. Quickly, he got to his apartment and sank down onto his bed. He didn't want to move a muscle, but he knew he had to. Dragging himself back up, he picked up a pack and started packing weapons into it. After a quick check around, he left the apartment, locking it behind him. And then, making sure no one saw him, he slipped away from Konoha, and into the surrounding forest.

* * *

Kakashi jumped quickly through the trees. He had only been searching a day, and he'd already been tipped off as to his prey's whereabouts. And now, he was pretty sure he had located them. Dropping to the ground, he took out a kunai and a piece of paper. Slinking forward, he noted that his main prey was distracted and, oh how lucky, bending down. Kakashi slunk forward silently, and chopped the back of his prey's head. The body fell to the ground softly. Once Kakashi was sure he hadn't damaged the man, he looked around. Spying what he wanted, he ran over to the sleeping figure. Kakashi threw the figure over his shoulder, then walked back to the unconscious man he had hit. This was going perfectly. Just one final touch. Kakashi bent down and placed the note where the person was sure to find it. Finally, he stood back up and fled into the night.

* * *

Madara had kept watch over Deidara's body for a full day. He didn't even sleep. He kept telling himself he could've gone another few days, but Tobi would want to watch over Deidara as well, and if he did watch for the next few days he wouldn't be in the best shape possible. So, reluctantly, he let Tobi take over.

'How's Deidara doing?' Tobi asked, crawling over to the artist.

/He's doing the best he could be for someone with almost no chakra and who's been unconscious for a day and a half. Plus he has no body fat at all, and can barely keep himself warm./

'We have a good stockpile of wood, though. We'll be able to keep the fire going through the night.'

/Right. Check on his temperature./ Tobi reached forward and brushed his hand against Deidara's cheek.

'He's good. Did you feed him?'

/Yes. Just feed him in the morning. Now, if you don't mind, I'm going to sleep. It's up to you to protect him./

'Hai, Madara-san.' Tobi accepted his responsibility willingly. He sat, watching the fire and Deidara. Deidara would occasionally twitch, or groan softly. These were good signs, signs that meant he was approaching wakefulness, and with wakefulness came recovery. Tobi suddenly felt very lonely, without Madara or Deidara to talk to. When one is lonely, they tend to retreat into their own thoughts, and this is exactly what Tobi did. He started thinking about how Deidara felt. Was Deidara only trusting Madara and him only for the sake of his arm, or was he able to trust Madara for the sake of trust? Tobi hoped Deidara was beginning to trust Madara. A crackling noise came from the fire, and Tobi noticed it was growing low. Crouching over the fire, Tobi began to add some wood. It was then that suddenly, without any warning, he felt a blow to the back of his head and he fell to the side, unconscious.

* * *

Tobi blearily opened his eyes, blinking rapidly to clear them. What had happened? Tobi sat up, rubbing his eyes and surveying the camp. Suddenly he shot wide awake, leaping to his feet. Deidara wasn't there.

/What the fuck happened?/ Madara screamed.

'I- I don't know!' Tobi cried frantically. He took a step forward, and felt something under his foot. Looking down, he found a note. Picking it up, he felt as if a lead ball had dropped into his stomach.

_Dear Obito,_

_Yes, I've taken your lover. But don't worry, he's a bad person. You have to see that he's a bad person, Obito. He's killed people, treated innocent people worse than I've treated him. I don't know how else to make you understand._

_I want to talk to you. I haven't taken Deidara to Konoha, I'm waiting for you, actually, to find me. I'll include my location, and I'll expect you to find me. I desperately want you to see the right side of things. Please, don't let your mind be deluded by some puppy love, you need to think logically. If you would only think logically, you would see that by associating with some scum like him, you'd realize you won't be any better than him. Please, I'm trying to help you. Come find me, and we can talk then._

_-Kakashi._

After the signature, Kakashi's location was given. Tobi snapped, falling to his knees, tears welling in his eyes. "How could we?" he sobbed. "Deidara was t- trusting us-"

/TOBI!/ Madara bellowed. /Stop your sniveling! If we don't act immediately, Deidara is as good as dead. Follow my every instruction, and we can save him. Do you understand?/

'Y- yes.'

/Right. Take deep, calming breaths. Slow your heart. Clear your head. . .flush all shock and worry out of your system. . ./ Tobi took slow, deep breaths. After calming himself, he was shoved to the back of his own head, and Madara showed himself. Leaping to his feet, he sent his fist through a nearby tree.

"Just you wait, Kakashi," he growled. "You're going to wish you'd never even seen Deidara." Madara started off, folding the letter and putting it in his pocket. He then leapt into the nearest tree and started after Kakashi.

* * *

A/N: Did anyone notice I killed Asuma? Anyone? Here, I'll explain: Deidara killed all the men who raped him, except Kakashi. And then Kakasih later says '. . .when Asuma got horny. . .' Anyone get that? I hope I don't have any Asuma fans reading this. Anyone else notice Madara's accent change? Usually he's speaking like an American, because I have a new friend I've been modeling him off, but he suddenly reverted back to speaking with a British accent. Go figure. But only when he's explaining to Dei-chan what his arm looks like. Go back and read it if you don't believe me. REVIEW PLEASE!


	19. The Torture and the Death

A/N: All right, angst ahoy! And are you sure you didn't notice when I killed Asuma? Damn. I should put out the warning now: CHARACTER DEATH!

* * *

Kakashi bent over Deidara, hands quickly removing his cloak. Deidara groaned. Kakashi stared in wonderment at the artist's right arm. Bandages? Taking out a kunai, Kakashi soon had the bandages ripped off Deidara's arm. Curious, Kakashi also cut the stitching. The arm now hung at an awkward angle, flesh barely being held together. Kakashi smirked. Reaching in his pack, Kakashi pulled out a length of rope and quickly he had Deidara's hands tied behind his back, palms facing outward. Kakashi then tied his ankles together. This was the easiest prisoner he had ever held hostage. Deidara groaned again, but Kakashi ignored him. Kakashi stared into the fire, and as one tends to do when alone, he retreated to his own thoughts. He let his head hang as his thoughts turned to Iruka. Couldn't Ituka see how much Kakashi cared about him? Angrily, Kakashi stood up, giving a solid kick to Deidara's ribs, getting a satisfying crack. Why couldn't Iruka see that, for once, Kakashi was serious? Another kick, this time in the stomach. "I can take care of myself," Kakashi muttered.

"Hmm, but you can't bother to keep a hostage properly to save your life, now can you?" Deidara muttered. Kakashi growled, grabbing Deidara's hair and bringing the artist's face to his knee. Once he was let go of, Deidara spit out blood.

"You don't know anything," Kakashi growled.

"Mmm," Deidara mumbled, still not opening his eye. Even that one little comment had taken too much energy. Kakashi gave another kick to Deidara's ribs. Another crack.

"If it weren't for criminals like you, my life would be perfect," Kakashi snarled. After ten minutes of mindless kicking, Deidara started coughing up blood. After twenty minutes he was out cold. After a half an hour, Kakashi finally tired of it and sat down. "If it weren't for damn criminals, I would have Iruka to relieve these sexual frustrations. Might as well make the one who's fault it is pay for it."

Deidara groaned and awoke, his head spinning with dizziness, his body consumed in a fiery pain. "You're awake," Kakashi stated, grabbing Deidara's shoulder roughly, digging his nails into the skin. Deidara felt the flaps of his torn, tattered clothing pushed aside and something pushed between his legs. He let out a whimper. Kakashi laughed. "You've done worse to so many more people, Deidara," he cooed.

"I. . .haven't. . ." Deidara gasped as he was torn apart.

"You've done everything imaginable to deserve this, Deidara. You deserve a slow, painful, bloody death. You won't get what you deserve if I take you for an execution. You deserve much, much worse than a simple execution. You deserve everything I'm doing," Kakashi, in a rage, threw Deidara forward with his hips in the air. Deidara was beyond caring how much blood he spilled.

"This is justice," Kakashi groaned. Deidara whimpered, falling into a black abyss.

* * *

The five days it took Madara to find Kakashi and Deidara, were like hell on earth. Tobi's nerves were completely fried, and every two seconds he would have an adrenaline rush and take over, then he would charge off in the wrong direction. It would take a while for Madara to finally get him under control and head back on track. And with every hour, the guilt grew.

Madara crept into the clearing and felt like being sick. The stench of blood clung to his nostrils, but the pong of rotting flesh was even worse. At first Madara thought Deidara was dead, his corpse already rotting away into the earth. But then he caught sight of the body, and it was, though dead looking, not rotting. Deidara lay on his back, clothes torn and covered in blood. If at first Deidara had been thin, he was near skeletal now, his arms hanging loosely, bound behind his back. But the scariest sight was Deidara's unfocused, dull blue eye, staring at nothing and not even registering Madara's appearance. Yet, scarier than all of this, was Kakashi bending over Deidara with insidious intent in his eyes. Flying into a blind rage, Madara charged at Kakashi. Unfortunately, the Copy Ninja was ready for him and dodged the attack. They stood, facing each other over Deidara's mangled body, panting. "You finally came, Obito," Kakashi grinned genuinely.

"You're sick," Madara spat, glaring. "I'm not Obito. And you've just picked the worst opponent," Leaping over Deidara's body, Madara crashed into Kakashi, pinning him to a tree faster than the human eye could follow. "What did you do to Deidara?" he growled. Kakashi laughed.

"Criminals can never find peace. And it's all because of criminals that I'm frustrated-" Madara dug his elbow into Kakashi's windpipe.

"You didn't," he growled. "If you lay a finger on him with any sexual intent, I swear you will never live to see home again."

"No worse than what you did," Kakashi smiled. "I just touched him the same way, did the same things you did-" Madara dug his elbow further into Kakashi's neck.

"You're a sick, twisted, man. How can it possibly be his fault you're frustrated, huh?" Madara saw how this had all started. A simple kidnapping. And then Kakashi had been left alone for too long with a helpless, chakra-less, beautiful body he felt deserved punishment. Kakashi was a lonely, sad, mad person. "You're no better than a criminal," Madara finally sighed. "Best to kill you quickly, though. . ." Madara trailed off ominously, grabbing Kakashi's collar and throwing him to the ground. "Half of me wants to give you a taste of all the damage you did." Madara forced Kakashi to his knees, arms pinned behind his back. Madara placed his knee on the lower part of Kakashi's back and began to press down, when a whimper caught his attention. Deidara was looking at them, utter panic and terror in his expression and eye. Madara felt his stone heart break. But just then, Kakashi snapped.

"Don't do this!" he began to plead. "I- I don't want this-" Madara growled, as Deidara gave a shudder and curled himself into a ball.

"See what you did to Deidara?"

"Yes! I see!"

"You're a coward-"

"Just kill him!" Deidara screamed, eye closed tightly. Too tightly. Madara groaned, feeling torn. He wanted so badly to show Kakashi what he had done, but not in front of Deidara. Not right now. With a roar, Madara finished his work and kneeled beside Deidara, scooping the artist into his arms and swiftly running off into the forest.

All that can be said for Kakashi is that he didn't make Tsunade's expectations of being in her office on time, in one piece. Whether it be the timing or the state his health, that is for you to let your imagination run amok with.

* * *

Madara lay Deidara against a tree. Deidara tried to get away, but Madara held him there. "Dei, listen to me," he said firmly. Deidara shook his head violently, struggling with all his might against Madara. "Dei, it's me, Madara," Madara pleaded. Deidara shook his head again, and wriggled out from underneath Madara. He couldn't stand, but only pull himself along with his left arm. And he only made it to the next tree before he stopped and puked. Madara's heart twisted when he saw Deidara had nothing to vomit up. Deidara collapsed, having no energy to go on.

"Kill. . . . me," he panted. "I want. . .to. . .die. . ." Madara rushed over to the artist, grasping him firmly by the shoulders.

"Don't talk that way, Dei-chan," he pleaded. "Things will get better-"

"Just kill me!" Deidara screamed, writhing in a vain attempt to get away from Madara. "I. . .don't want. . .to feel him. . .on me. . ."

"Deidara, please, things will get better-"

"I'm. . .going. . .to die," Deidara went limp in Madara's grip. "I want. . .to die. . ." and he fainted. The guilt crushed Madara like a ton of water. But he had a life to save, and could feel guilty later. Quickly, he stripped off his cloak and ripped it into strips, wrapping them around the worst of Deidara's wounds. Gashes and bruises littered Deidara's perfect body, but there was one body part Madara skipped; Deidara's right arm.

* * *

It had been a day since Madara found Deidara. It had been a day of traveling, and every once in a while Madara would stop and change Deidara's bandages. Every time Deidara said less, until the last time he didn't even say a word, not even of his wish to die.

It had been an hour since the last time Madara stopped, and Deidara's constant hold on his shoulder had slackened, his left arm going as limp as his right one. And he had gone colder. Madara stopped on a branch and put his ear to Deidara's chest, hearing an erratic heartbeat. Sighing, Madara continued. He had to get back to the base before Deidara slipped any further towards death. And out of his desperation, Madara heard someone below them. Looking down for a moment, Madara saw Itachi and Kisame. Relief swept over him as he leapt to the ground, right in front of Itachi.

"Madara-sama?" Itachi asked, slightly surprised. Madara ignored Itachi and dodged around him, shoving the battered Deidara into Kisame's arms.

"Get him to the hideout, or else he'll die," Madara growled. Kisame looked to Itachi.

"Do as he says," Itachi said softly. Kisame nodded and darted off. Madara panted, wiping his forehead. "Madara-sama?" Itachi asked, laying a soft hand on Madara's heaving shoulder. "How long have you been traveling?"

"At least a day, maybe more," Madara replied. Itachi nodded.

"Rest," he said. Madara slapped Itachi's hand away.

"I'm fine," he growled, and ran after Kisame. Itachi sighed and followed.

* * *

"Woman, if you don't open this door right now, he'll die," Kisame was saying as Itachi and Madara caught up. Konan opened the door and stepped aside, realizing the urgency of the situation. Madara rushed in and looked around. Pein was obviously in his office. Quickly, he turned to Itachi and Kisame.

"Take him to the infirmary and clean him up. I swear, if you let him die-"

"That might be impossible," Itachi said.

"Get going!" Madara bellowed. Kisame jumped, though Madara was ever so slightly shorter than him and rushed off to the makeshift infirmary they had set up at the back of the hideout. Itachi didn't move. Madara growled. "Itachi, if you don't move your lazy ass, I'll never fulfill my promise." Itachi nodded and left the room after Kisame. Madara turned to Konan. "Did you think you were exempt from this? I'm not going to be happy if he dies." Konan bowed her head.

"Hai, Madara-sama," she said mysteriously, vanishing from before him. Madara didn't bother to dwell on how she knew his name, and marched straight to Pein's office.

* * *

"What's going on out there?" Pein asked, standing as soon as Madara entered the office.

"Deidara's hurt, badly," Madara replied.

"Why do you want to save him so badly? If he got hurt, then-"

"I don't want to hear it. I need to save him right now, but I wanted to let you know, your days as leader are numbered." With this, Madara turned on his heel and left the room. Pein stood, flabbergasted. If Madara thought he could push Pein around, he was sadly- correct. Pein realized that putting up a fight would only cause a large, traumatic battle he was likely to loose or sustain wounds that would disable him as a ninja. And now, he had something to loose; a beautiful wife and a gorgeous daughter. It wasn't fair to risk them.

* * *

Madara burst through the doors and marched straight over to the examining table. Kisame and Itachi had gotten Deidara stripped down to his nearly shredded boxers. Now, for the first time, Madara gazed upon the full damage Kakashi had caused. Deidara's chest was sliced, a horrible purple bruising spreading around his ribs. And his right arm, it was a horrible black, dead color, the skin hanging dead and flabby around what remained of the flesh. The flesh was peeling around the fingers, the fingernails a disgusting yellow, and around where the stitching should've been a black, scab like crusting had formed. Sighing, Madara turned his eyes to Itachi.

"He's going to loose the arm for good, if he's lucky," Konan said. "All the blood is pooling there. But the blood isn't returning." Madara sighed again.

Deidara woke up three times before the end.

The first he blearily looked around and only glimpsed Madara's face, contorted in concentration. "Would there be any way to get him another arm?" Madara asked, and a sudden pain flooded Deidara's right shoulder. It was worse than the first time he had lost it, much worse. He let out a painful whimper.

"He's awake," Konan said.

"Put him out again, it's better for him," Madara ordered. Thankfully, Deidara slipped back into his black comfort.

The second time, he was a little more alert, and was able to deduce they had given him something to make him sleep. And then he realized he wasn't facing upwards, but rather was on his stomach with his legs spread. Someone had a grip on his left arm, and a soft hand at the nape of his neck. Either Itachi or Konan. "If he wakes up, it could be bad," Madara was saying. And then Deidara felt a finger circle his entrance, covered in some sort of substance. He panicked, struggling feebly against whoever was holding him. "Shh, Dei," Madara soothed. "It's just me. Give him another shot." Deidara felt something pierce his arm, a coldness flowing through his veins, and then he retreated back to his unconsciousness.

Madara finished spreading the medicine around Deidara's entrance and sat back, breathing hard. He had worked nonstop for the past seven hours and concentrated the hardest he ever had in his life. "Can you get him dressed?" He asked Konan. She nodded, expertly slipping Deidara into a pair of pants. When she went to put on his shirt, Madara stopped her. "We need to let the wounds get some air." Konan nodded again and stepped back, waiting to see what Madara did next. Summoning the last of his strength, Madara lifted Deidara up and carried him to his room, laying him sweetly on the bed. Madara barely made it to the other bed before collapsing and letting Tobi take over. And that night, for the first time, Deidara and Tobi slept in the same room at the hideout.

The last time Deidara woke up, it was for good. He cracked an eye open, didn't like all the sun streaming into his eye, and closed it. But the damage had been done, and he was forced to acknowledge he had woken up. "Sempai?" "Fuck. . .you. . .Tobi. . ." Deidara breathed.

"What?" Tobi asked. Deidara groaned.

"What happened. . .to my. . .arm?"

"Uh, we had to. . .you see, Kakashi-" Deidara squeaked at the mention of the Copy Ninja. Tobi sighed. "Deidara, your arm was dead. All the blood was pooling there, and it was in order to save you," Tobi explained. Deidara whimpered.

"How can I. . .function?" he asked pathetically. "There's no. . .reason to live. . ."

"Don't say that, Sempai! There's plenty of reason to live!"

"What for, un?!" Deidara cried angrily. The force of his words caused him to lapse into a coughing fit. Tobi reached out to place a hand on Deidara's shoulder, but the artist merely slapped it away. Tobi felt his heart break.

"Sempai, please let me help you-"

"I'm still recovering from the last time I did," Deidara whispered bitterly. "Get out, get out now!" The words took too much effort to be a simple command. Deidara honestly wanted Tobi gone, enough to spend what little energy he had on telling Tobi that.

Outside the door, Tobi curled his knees to his chest and rested his head on them. Silently, the tears began rolling down his cheeks. After all this time, all this effort, they were back to square one. Tobi was locked out of the room.

* * *

A/N: IF YOU LIKED THIS CHAPTER, SAY AYE! (btw, Deidara died in the original version, but I decided that was a step too far.)


	20. Don't Let It Sting

Things did not get better. Madara and Tobi weren't allowed in Deidara's room, and to Madara's eternal disgust, Deidara seemed to favor receiving checkups from the new mother, Konan. Madara found himself sulking outside Deidara's room, and giving Konan nasty glares whenever he saw her. Konan was able to ignore the Sharingan glares, and simply reported on Deidara's health.

"He might receive a few scars on his back, but otherwise the other cuts will heal up in time. I don't doubt he'll be able to get used to life without his arm, but he'll probably bitch about it around you."

"How do you figure that?" Madara demanded.

"It's your fault, isn't it?" Konan replied, shifting her baby slightly on her hip. "He'll also give Kakuzu a hard time, but that's beside the point, isn't it? As for his psyche, who can tell? I predict he'll bounce right back."

"And how do you draw that conclusion?" Madara asked, tired of her seemingly endless knowledge.

"Well, it's pretty simple. From what I've been able to get out of him-"

"Hold it! He told you what happened?"

"Mostly. Is there a problem?" Madara dug his fingernails into the table.

"No. Continue."

"He won't be a ninja anymore, but I doubt suicide is still an option for him."

"What?" Madara sighed. He was getting a headache. Konan sighed.

"Have you ever put something explosive in a box and tried to keep it there? The box ends up exploding. Deidara's feelings were explosive, and there was no way for them to get out. As long as I was able to get him to talk about it, it relieved some of the immediate pressure, and now he can embark on the slow, aching, painful recovery." Madara had never given much thought to Konan, after all, he was slightly sexist. That was why he thought only men worthy enough of him. But now he wanted to know more about her, and get more knowledge on Deidara.

"So you don't think he'll kill himself?"

"As long as the recovery doesn't drag itself out. If it gets to seem like there's no end, he'll consider killing himself. That will take your cooperation, Madara-san."

"What did you address me as?"

"Madara-sama, did I not say it loud enough?" Konan replied. She didn't put any emotion into her words, which annoyed Madara to no end. And her complete lack of dignity didn't help matters any more. Arrogant and shameless, a very bad combination.

"So, what exactly happened to Deidara?" Madara asked, getting back to the subject of his constant worry.

"Raped, to put it simply. Starved, obviously, beaten regularly, and verbally abused. Nothing out of the ordinary."

"Nothing out of the ordinary?" Madara cried, leaping up from his seat.

"Yes. If I only need to speak louder, might you instruct me to do so?" Konan made perfect eye contact with Madara.

"What, pray tell, is ordinary about that?"

"Hmm, not very involved with Deidara, are you? Or are you not acquainted with Iwa and their orphans?"

"How do you know all of this?" Madara cried. Konan picked up her tea and sipped at it.

"Would you like some tea?" she offered.

"Answer the damn question!"

"Do you know anyone from Iwa?"

"Excluding Deidara?"

"Yes, Madara-san, excluding Deidara."

"What did you call me?"

"Madara-sama, did I speak otherwise?" Konan sipped her tea again. Madara growled. "Rape, abuse of both physical and mental, and starvation aren't strangers to Deidara. Have you ever asked him about his childhood?"

"No. . .but that's not important-"

"Madara-san-"

"I heard you! You said Madara-san!"

"Is there a problem, Madara-sama?" she asked emotionlessly, her blue eyes passive.

"Konan, it's been a week, and you know all of this?"

"I have known, for quite some time, most of these things. Would you like tea?"

"No! I don't want any fucking tea!" Madara cried.

"All right. Is there anything else you wish to know?"

"Tell me what happened to Deidara in his childhood!"

"No," Konan refused.

"I swear, Konan, if you're withholding information-"

"Why yes, I am," Konan said. "If you just asked, I would've told you that I was withholding information. I pride myself on being helpful."

"Now I know why I don't like women," Madara muttered.

"I'm only withholding information because Dei-chan asked me do. He's not in as bad of shape as you think." Konan sipped at her tea. "Might I interest you in some jasmine tea? It's quite good, if I do say so."

"What is it with you and the tea?" Madara demanded.

"I only wish to offer you the best, and since I already got Deidara to drink some, I think it might soothe your nerves." Konan sipped her tea again.

"My nerves don't need soothing," Madara growled. Konan nodded.

"Of course. How could I suggest such a thing? The great Madara is never subject to guilt." Konan rebalanced her daughter. "When are you planning on killing my husband?" she asked emotionlessly.

"Hopefully I won't have to get rid of him. I would like to keep him as an ally," Madara replied. Konan nodded.

"Quite merciful, Madara-sama." They sat in silence, before Madara sat back down.

"Why does Deidara want to withhold information from me?"

"That information he also wishes to be withheld."

"I truly want to kill you."

"Never fear, your feelings are returned on my part." Konan stood. "Aiko is getting fussy, I'm going to put her to bed." Madara glanced at the baby, which hadn't made a noise this whole time.

"Is it even alive?" he asked, stepping over to Konan and looking down at the baby. Dull, bored blue eyes looked back at him, chubby hands resting patiently over her small stomach. Konan waited for a moment, before turning towards the room she shared with Pein. Madara sighed, sitting back down.

* * *

Deidara opened the door to his room and poked his head out. Seeing no Madara, he relaxed and stepped out. "Good to see you, Sempai!" Tobi cried enthusiastically. Deidara jumped and whirled around, wondering exactly where Tobi had come from. He stood with his head bowed, hands fidgeting in front of him. Tobi noticed how covered Deidara was, adorned in long sleeves and pants. And how his shirt clung to his concave stomach. Deidara turned his back to Tobi and began to walk towards the kitchen. "Do you need any help, Sempai?" Tobi asked, following Deidara. Deidara sighed and shook his head.

"No, Tobi," he said softly.

"Ok," Tobi smiled warmly. Deidara finally made it to the kitchen and fixed himself a moderate meal. As he ate it, Tobi sat across from him at the table. "Are you feeling ok?" Tobi asked. Deidara nodded, not looking particularly interested in Tobi. "Are you feeling better?" Deidara nodded. "Can you talk?"

"Yeah, un."

"Will you talk?"

"No, un."

"Are you mad at me?"

"Is it that obvious?" Deidara cried, standing up. "I'd rather have a fucked up arm and be without you than this mess I'm in now. You've literally ruined my life, and in the span of a mere day." Deidara turned his back to Tobi. "Can you really blame me for being a bit peeved?" Tobi sighed.

"No, I can't, Sempai. I could never blame you."

* * *

"Stay still."

"Just don't make it sting, all right?" Deidara closed his eye as Konan picked at the stitching.

"That's impossible. Don't ask for impossible things." Deidara sighed, allowing Konan to remove the stitching from his arm.

"Have you talked to Madara?" Deidara finally asked.

"Yes."

"Was he worried?"

"Incurably." Deidara sighed.

"You told him it was his fault, right?"

"Yes." Deidara allowed the silence to close in on them once more.

"Am I going to get another arm?" he finally asked hopefully. Konan sighed.

"No," she answered. "You won't get another arm. You'll just live without one." Deidara sighed.

"Are you done yet?" he asked impatiently.

"No."

"Can you hurry it up?" Konan obliged Deidara, ripping out the last few stitches.

"Better?" she asked.

"You know it isn't," Deidara sighed. Konan didn't say a word. But, eventually, she spoke.

"Why are you so mad at him?" she asked softly. Deidara sighed.

"Come on, he abused my trust, un! And because of him I lost my arm. If only he could've just left it, or at least protected me better, then nothing would've happened. But no, he just had to-"

"He was doing the right thing," Konan stated. "He was trying to help. But he screwed it up pretty badly, now didn't he?" Deidara sighed again.

"Still, he could've done something! It's like he didn't care enough to protect me. And- it wasn't fun, you know, getting kidnapped like that."

"He saved your life. . ."

"But still, it's going to be a while before I trust him again. Anything else?"

"Yes. Get up and walk to the other side of the room and back," Konan ordered. Deidara sighed and got off the bed, walking across the room and back.

"What was that about?" he asked, sitting down.

"You aren't limping anymore. That shows progress."

"I was limping?"

"Yes, quite badly. But not anymore, so there's not much point in mentioning it." Deidara sighed. "Is there anything you want me to tell Madara-san?"

"What did you call him?"

"Madara-sama. Would you like me to deliver a message?"

"No, un. If there's anything I need to tell him, I'll have to tell him myself, hmm."

"All right. I'll tell him that."

"Konan. . ."

"Yes?"

"You already told him."

* * *

A/N: Reviews please! I would like to make something very clear: Kakashi was not raped. Nope, not even a little bit. Ha, hahah. . .hah. . .(Monty Python. Gotta love 'em.) I was hoping all of you would understand that the business (did I call it that? Really. . .hmm, well I'm a bit lazy to look at it, but you all know the sentence I'm talking about.) he had really come for was to save Deidara, not kill/rape/whatever-the-hell-you-thought to Kakashi. Subtle difference, I know, but it was subtle because everything good about Madara is subtle. And as for the character death. . .I'm probably going to hell for it. Seriously. Can't wait, though. Did any of you notice what I made you guys into? Democrats! I had you all sticking up for a serial killer! I'm soooo magical. Anyone who said 'poor Dei' were sticking up for someone who could've killed your mother and your tottery old grandmother (I fucking HAVE one of those now! It's sooo weird!) and not had a second thought about it. See? I'm magical. But, sadly, the character death didn't apply to Deidara. See? You made me ruin my feeling, the whole mystery of it all, just because you couldn't figure out Kakashi died! Oh well, review please!


	21. I Want To Breath That Fire Again

Deidara was walking down the hallway, when Hidan rudely opened a door in front of him. "Oh, sorry," he sneered sarcastically. He looked Deidara over. "My, my, my, finally lost that arm for good? Must be difficult, you whore-" Deidara pulled back and punched Hidan's face, no rational thought connect the action to Deidara's mind. Hidan's head, surprisingly, flew off. Deidara smirked, kicking the head behind him and into Itachi's room, closing the door.

"My, my, my, finally lost that head of yours? Not like you were using it, though," Deidara easily ducked Hidan's poorly aimed punches and skipped down the hall, grinning.

"Damn it, Deidara! I'm going to fucking kill you!"

"Jeez Hidan, don't loose your head!" Deidara called back down the hall.

"The pain of awful puns! Say another awful pun, I swear, and-" Deidara proceeded to ignore Hidan as he walked into the kitchen. There he found someone else he felt like being a bitch to.

"Kakuzu. . ." he said slowly. Kakuzu looked up from his newspaper. "Just saying, but don't you agree that money is the best form of art?" Kakuzu raised an eyebrow, and then his face fell.

"If you-"

"But isn't money best when it's. . .fleeting?" Deidara giggled. Kakuzu snarled, looking like he could strangle Deidara.

"You wouldn't dare," he growled. Deidara gave his cutest, prettiest smile.

"Come on, hit me," he urged. "You know you want to." And as Kakuzu went to charge at Deidara, the artist delivered the blow no man would expect. Especially when fighting another man, no male warrior would expect something so low. But to Deidara, it was sweet, sweet revenge as Kakuzu doubled over, knees pressed together. "Kakuzu, you deserved that, and your artistic money, un," Deidara said, grinning. As he turned, however, he came face to face with Tobi. "T-Tobi-" he stuttered, taking a step back. Tobi tried to give Deidara a reassuring smile.

"Glad to see you're up, Sempai," he said happily. Deidara turned and began to leave the room quickly, when Tobi reached out and grasped Deidara's only wrist, pulling the smaller artist against his larger frame. Gently, he wrapped his arms around Deidara's waist. "It's ok, Sempai. I'm Tobi," Tobi whispered in Deidara's ear. Gradually, Deidara relaxed, and let Tobi embrace him. Kakuzu rolled his eyes, and went back to whatever he had been doing.

* * *

That was a month after the incident. It was the first time Deidara had let Tobi touch him. A month later, Deidara would let Madara hug him close. But it was six months before they were able to talk.

* * *

Deidara and Tobi lay on the only furnished bed in their room. Deidara was, awkwardly, resting his head on Madara's shoulder, and Madara had a protective arm around Deidara's waist. "I'm an adult, now," Deidara whispered.

"What?" Tobi asked.

"I turned eighteen last week, un," Deidara elaborated. Tobi sat up in shock.

/He was seventeen when we had sex with him?/ Madara asked incredulously. Another change that had occurred was Madara's reference to the time when Tobi and Deidara had had sex. He referred to it as if both Tobi and Madara had done it. The answer he had given Tobi was simply that he had experienced it as well, and he had instructed Tobi, so it was as much him as Tobi. But Tobi knew that Madara knew he would never be able to touch Deidara on his own.

"Why didn't you tell me? We could've celebrated-"

"I never celebrate my birthday, un. I just thought you might like to know."

"Why don't you want to celebrate?" Tobi asked, lying back down. Deidara shrugged, snuggling closer to Tobi. He was showing the most affection today than he had in a long time.

"I don't know the exact date, yeah. I was only able to find out down to the week, hmm."

"Do I want to inquire further?" Tobi asked. Deidara shrugged.

"I managed to work out from someone that I was three months old in the summer, and then I worked out it was early summer, so I deduced the month, and I finally managed to find someone who told me it was early May."

"So. . .you were an orphan?"

"Yeah," Deidara said softly, turning his face to Tobi's shoulder.

/Wait! I think I'm remembering something- orphans, Iwa, he's eighteen. . .oh shit!/

'What is it?'

/He's a war orphan! Oh God, how-/

"Deidara-sempai, are you a war orphan?"

"Yeah. My parents died during the last part of the war, when Iwa was loosing." Tobi waited politely for Deidara to continue.

'What does a war orphan mean? Is it anything special in Iwa?'

/It means a number of things. But shouldn't I let him tell you? He'll get mad at me if I don't./

'Madara. . .'

"You listening Tobi?"

"Of course, Sempai. Go on whenever you're ready."

"Iwa lost pretty bad. It's like, in our- their- genetics to be stubborn assholes, yeah. We were broke, starved, sick, and we still continued sending out ninjas with almost no training, who were dying almost instantly, yeah. If you didn't have parents, you were forced into the ninja academy, and if you didn't want to be a ninja and go to your almost certain death, you killed yourself, un." Deidara closed his eye, relaxing slightly into Tobi's embrace.

'What do I say?' Tobi cried in his head.

/Oh, you think that's bad? If he goes on, you'll see real damage./

'What do I say?'

/How am I supposed to know? He has to have a point with all of this. . ./ Tobi settled for running his hands through Deidara's hair. This seemed to satisfy Deidara.

"Nobody gave us any money. I begged all I liked, and no one gave me even a yen. Eating out of trash cans can only get you so far. . ." Deidara gulped. "People weren't willing to give away, but they would. . .spend. . ." Deidara sighed. "I promised myself I w-would only do it a few times, just to get enough f-food to get enough strength to get a real. . .well, be able to do something to get food." Deidara gulped and glanced up at Tobi. "Don't look at me that way," he snapped. Tobi was taken aback.

"What way, Sempai?"

"Like I'm some wounded bird! It's disgusting!"

"I wasn't-" Tobi looked into Deidara's eye, and he knew. Deidara saw Madara.

'He's talking to you, Madara.'

/No he's not. I don't dare make an appearance./

'Why not?'

/He's scary./

'What?'

/It's something Konan said. He's not thinking right, now. You can-/

'Bullshit. Madara, you've faced worse things than a distraught Deidara. What are you really scared of?'

/Every time I try and say something, he freaks out! It's best if I just sit tight and wait this one out./

'But he doesn't want my approval, he knows he has it. You'd better take over right now, Madara, or so help me-'

/Fine. . ./ Madara took over, and instantly something changed in Deidara. Maybe Tobi was right.

"This is just plain silly," Madara said. "Why are you making such a big deal of something that happened in the past?" Deidara blinked.

"I just thought you might like to know," he mumbled.

"Deidara, the only way this would be relevant is if you have some STD you need to warn me about. But even if you did, we're both fucked because we've already had sex. So what's this about?"

"Oh, like you weren't thinking it," Deidara huffed. "What role did you play in the war?" Madara blinked.

/Damn you, Tobi./ he thought bitterly.

"Um. . .it was quite a long time ago. . .let's see, I didn't have Tobi. . .that would mean. . ." Madara thought, truly. "Oh yes, I was the one with the idea for the Kannabi Bridge thing. . ." Deidara stared at Madara.

"That was your idea?" Deidara asked. Madara nodded.

"Don't tell me. . ."

"Yeah, I'm not going to say it. But you know it," Deidara sighed. "I wouldn't be here if Konoha hadn't destroyed the Kannabi Bridge. Half the village starved because there was no food, and- shit, I'm not going into statistics. I'm thin? Your fault-"

"Look, Deidara, the truth is, is that if I had known that was the way things would turn out, I would have seriously considered throwing the war. I know there were starving and dead children just lying around, and the diseases, and what people would do for food. I know all the horror stories." Deidara looked away.

"Come on, say it," he muttered.

"What do you want from me?" Madara asked, voice low. "I've given you protection and patience. What more are you going to ask for?" Madara reached out, but Deidara slapped his hand away. Taking a deep breath, Deidara looked into Madara's eye.

"You're a heartless bastard who wouldn't think twice about murdering a puppy. But I just have one question for you." Deidara gently took Madara's hand and pressed it to his cheek. "When you touch me like this, who is it for?" Deidara let go of Madara's hand, but it stayed there, caressing his face.

"I'm not sure if I've seen more destruction than you have," he said slowly, ignoring Deidara's question. "But I do know that I've had more time to see such things. You aren't yet out of your teens." Madara leaned forward, their noses almost touching. "Who would I touch you for? I would touch you for the sake of us." Deidara's eye widened as Madara closed the small gap between them, capturing Deidara's chapped lips in his. Deidara grinned.

"I knew I was worrying for nothing," he whispered. Madara smirked.

"As usual."

* * *

"Pien. . ."

"I know what you're here for. And believe me, I would like to end this without harm to myself, my wife, or my daughter." Madara quirked an eyebrow, leaning against the doorway.

"Really?" Madara drawled. "No harm to you?" Pein sighed, standing from his desk. "It's about time I took things into my own hands. I've had my own goals for Akatsuki for a while now, and I've humored you long enough. Step aside and give me control of Akatsuki, or I can guarantee there will be blood shed."

"Who's blood?" Pein asked.

"Who do you think?" Madara growled. "I've lost all patience with you." Pein bowed his head.

"Believe me, Madara-sama, I would fight you on this matter, believe me. But an innocent life is in my hands, and I cannot jeaprodize Aiko when she has only lived six months." Madara choked back his surprise. "It's unfair of me to risk such a young life, and putting Konan at risk for something she doesn't even care about is pointless. She'd fight you, believe me, if she cared a little more."

"How strong is Konan, exactly?" Pein looked up, blinking in surprise at Madara's question.

"Why?"

"Is she stronger than you?"

"Yes." Pein whispered this single word. "But she has no wish to overthrow anyone. She says that, as long as she knows her own worth, why she would need a title for it. Madara, if you're even thinking of-"

"I won't lay a finger on Konan, for now. At least I won't have to fight her on this. Do you love her?"

"Yes," Pein mumbled. "I- I really, truly love her. Kill who you like, but threaten Konan and I'll be forced to step in. Madara-" Pein looked up. "-I don't exactly like it, but I know your power. I won't fight you." Madara grinned and walked over to him.

"You've made the right decision," he smirked down at Pein.

"I sure hope I have."

* * *

It was then that things began to get better. Of course, it was only a small amount at a time, but it was the everyday things that could sometimes bring a smile to your face.

* * *

"Bastard, un." Madara looked up, looking around in bewilderment. It wasn't Deidara's voice, but he could've sworn. . .Madara looked down to see the purple haired eight-month old Aiko looking up at him with large blue eyes. Pleased at the reaction she got from Madara, Aiko repeated her new word with gusto. "Bastard! Bastard!" Madara looked around angrily, and Deidara quickly hid his face behind a book, snickering to himself. Madara glared and stood up, walking over to the artist.

"Do you know how mad Konan's going to be when she realizes you taught Aiko a bad word?" Madara growled, leaning menacingly over Deidara. Deidara looked surprised.

"What? I didn't teach her that, un!"

"That smirk on your face says otherwise. . ."

"Girlie!" They both looked down at Aiko, who had tottered over to them. She grinned up at Deidara. "Feminine!" Deidara glared up at Madara, who grinned guiltily.

"I guess we're even?" Madara tried.

"You so just lost a blowjob-"

"Do NOT discuss your sex life in front of Aiko!" Pein cried, scooping up his daughter.

"Weakling!" Aiko giggled. Pein stared down at his daughter in bewilderment, then angrily down the hall.

"Konan!" he cried, marching down the hall to the room he shared with Konan. Deidara and Madara grinned at each other.

"You taught her that-" they both started, then stopped.

"You didn't, un?"

"I thought you did-" Madara and Deidara blinked at each other.

"It must've been Konan, yeah. . ." They were silent for a moment.

"You didn't mean it about the blowjob, did you?"

* * *

Sometimes, they were able to laugh, even. Though Madara would always be jealous of how easily Tobi could get Deidara to smile, and how easy Deidara was around Tobi, he knew Deidara was always more honest with him. They didn't talk about much, Madara knew to keep his mouth shut about anything that involved Kakashi, Konoha, or Iwa.

One would guess Madara wouldn't have a lot of time to devote to Deidara. But as it turned out, Madara had quite a lot of time on his hands. His first decision as leader was to let Deidara stay at the hideout, even though he was unable to complete missions. Madara knew not to mention Deidara's missing arm, as it was his fault, and no one else mentioned it. Deidara kept in shape, and could've been able to complete small missions, but Tobi had argued quite effectively against it. "Madara, he didn't choose to be a criminal, so it's fair to give him the choice now. If he wants to go on missions, that's his decision, not yours." And Madara effectively agreed. Deidara, though never failing to remind Tobi he could kick his ass, showed no interest in completing missions.

A/N: Ok, crappy chapter, introducing new material so close to the end, but I've been busy and, truly, a lot of crazy shit's been going on (like half my friends having melt downs and trying to kill themselves. Sigh.) so sorry for the poor quality! Reviews please!


	22. The Stars

A/N: Last chapter! Aw, you must be so lost without more of my crap to read! And if my profile didn't satisfy, why not try 'The Luckless Liars'. It's pretty different, but if you're feeling lost and abandoned, come try it out! Thank you for all the support, love, and hope you've given me over the course of this story, and I hope this last chapter is as good as you ever could've imagined!

Deidara stared at the mangled puppet. Confusion, once more, flooded his mind. But it seemed this time, he would banish the confusion with the truth. "Jeez, you did have it good. You had a family, and you had. . .me. I know someone who would kill for that. Two people, actually. So why would you kill yourself?" Then it hit Deidara. "You knew it, didn't you? You had a family, and you had me. But you didn't ever have both. . .yeah. When did you realize that, yeah? When did you suddenly realize you had it good, hmm? I suppose when you finally realized who didn't have it so good." Deidara sighed. "You know, I can still remember that look you gave me. I guess I was dumber back then, too, yeah. I didn't get it, un. Was it. . .sympathy, hmm? You heard the horror stories about Iwa after the war, yeah? Thought you had it rough, hmm? Then you realized exactly who you were screwing and didn't know what to do. I guess you realized exactly what you gave up, un. So you had to, well, give it all up. What guilt you must've felt! You gave up your humanity, your family, and then suddenly you realize exactly what you gave up, and can't even look at me, un. For all the times you screwed me, since I was fifteen. . ." Deidara paused. "The guilt would've killed you in the end. And, in essence, I guess it did, un. I'll bet you're the only Akatsuki member to feel guilty, yeah." Deidara paused, letting a grin spread across his face. "Well, asides from two. . ." Deidara crossed his arms over his chest, and stuck his tongue out at the puppet. "Fuck you, Sasori." Expectantly, Deidara turned to find himself pressed firmly against Madara's chest.

"I know," Madara whispered.

"Yup, I do too. Let's go," Deidara said, smiling and grabbing Madara's hand, leading him away from the bloody scene.

* * *

Madara opened an eye groggily. "Deidara?" he asked, yawning. "Did you fall out of bed?"

"Yeah," Deidara whispered. Madara waited for him to continue, and when he didn't, sat up to peer over the edge of the bed. Deidara was lying there, staring up at the ceiling, looking as if he had been artistically inspired.

"Would you like to get back in bed?" he asked, quirking an eyebrow.

"In a minute. . ." Deidara mumbled, keeping his gasze distractedly on the ceiling. Madara sighed. It must be an artist thing. A minute later, true to his word, Deidara crawled back in bed.

"Going to tell me what that was about?"

"No. . . un. . . Just a dream I've been having recently that I don't think I'll have again." With that, Deidara snuggled down into the covers and fell asleep again. Madara shrugged. It must be a Deidara thing.

* * *

"Itachi. . ." Madara breathed, coming up behind Itachi stealthily. Itachi didn't bother to turn around. "I said I would fulfill my promise." Itachi nodded slowly, still not turning around.

"Seems as if you're not all a bad person, wouldn't you say?" he said softly.

"Unless, of course, you would rather I not fulfill my promise. I would see that as a bit easier for me, in fact-" Itachi turned around.

"No!" he cried. Madara smirked. If only he could have Deidara wrapped so tightly around his finger.

"Right, if you really want me to. . ." Madara sighed. "And what do I get in return?"

"The best ninja you ever trained, Madara-sama," Itachi bowed his head. "And whatever I am able to offer." Madara thought of getting Deidara in a position like this. But, knowing the blond bomber, he'd get out of it and end up getting Madara to do something for him. At least he could have his fun with Itachi, right?

"And what exactly do you have to offer?" He asked, quirking an eyebrow. Itachi sighed.

"I would use whatever my abilities are for you." Madara yawned.

"Great, Itachi, but would I teach you something I didn't already possess? It wouldn't do me much good, now would it?" Madara thought of a million and one things Deidara would say if he were in this position, and how he would get Madara to end up licking his feet. And Itachi had nothing to reply to Madara's comment. "Exactly, Itachi. You seem to have backed yourself into a corner, haven't you?" Itachi took a step closer to Madara, pressing his chest against Madara's own.

"Madara. . ." he breathed. "There are some things I would be able to do for you that you would rather not do for yourself. Lightly, Itachi's hands flitted to Madara's fly. Madara chuckled, capturing Itachi's wrists.

"Believe me, I would accept your offer, if I didn't have someone ten times as sexy and fifteen times more willing waiting for me."

"You can't mean-"

"Hey, he's a blond, Itachi. You can't compete." And with that, Madara stepped back from Itachi, smirking. "But, since I'd hate to see my clan go downhill, I'll train you. But not now." Madara turned and left Itachi standing next to the training dummy. He walked off into the forest, just beyond the edge, and stopped. "You didn't say anything," he said aloud. Deidara sighed and hopped out of the tree he had been observing from.

"Well, I would've, but you said everything I would have, so I decided to stay put. Itachi's really a slut, isn't he, un?" Deidara grinned. "You must be real proud, Madara, yeah."

"Oh shut up. He doesn't represent all Uchihas."

"And I suppose you do, hmm?" Deidara drawled, stepping closer to Madara.

"Yes, in fact, I do."

". . .so everyone in the Uchiha clan is gay?" Needless to say, Madara preferred talking to someone who could stand up to him.

* * *

The grass was begging to be lain upon. Deidara wasn't usually one to oblige, but when the dewy green blades looked oh so tempting, and it had been such a long and tiring day. And, of course, with Tobi leaning against a tree, legs spread, simply begging for Deidara to curl up against him, it wasn't a particularly difficult decision. "The stars are pretty tonight, Sempai," Tobi murmured against Deidara's hair.

"Penny for your thoughts?" they asked at the same time. Tobi chuckled.

"How about we each say a word of our thought?" Tobi suggested.

"What, un? Fine, but I start."

"Fair enough."

"The, un." Tobi hummed, looking down at Deidara. The stars were shining in his eyes.

"Stars."

/Are./

'What? Since when were you part of this?'

/Since now. I say are./

"Madara says are."

"Blazing, un," Deidara grinned.

"Like. . ."

/Is it just me, or does he know what we were thinking? Such a rebel. . ./

"Madara says rebel."

/Who said that?/

'You did. Now shut up.'

"Diamonds. . .yeah. . ." Deidara muttered.

'What do you do with diamonds?'

/Cut?/

"Cut," Tobi said, wrapping his arms tighter around Deidara's waist.

/. . .out?/

"Madara says 'out'."

"Of, un. . ."

"The. . ."

/This is crazy. Sun./

"Madara says 'sun'." They sat in silence, Deidara's head resting comfortably on Tobi's shoulder, Tobi's hands resting low on Deidara's abdomen, elbows resting on his hips.

"Tobi, un?"

"Yeah?"

"You read my mind."


End file.
